A
female
age
51-59,
*rinch
writes:I am in my late 30's my child has recently moved to her dads in a diffrent city, my dad is in stage 5 alzheimers still being taking care by my mom. I have a great job only in the summers but the winters I am bored and on U.I. My long time freind wants me to move to a big city thats next to the ocean and where I live in the prairies. Im lost, should I stay here and help my mom with my dad or go to this big city where I know that I will enjoy. I went there for vacation and I fell in love with it. I feel I have no purpose anymore. Im not a parent anymore...well technicaly I am but I am not responsible for her anymore. So whats next? I just dont know what to do. help!
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male
reader, bluewarrior911  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 I once told my children that if for any reason i should fall ill, I would never want or expect them to ever have a conscience that they needed to care for me. For one thing, I have lived my life. It may not be 100% what i expected, but it was still my life by my own choices. Secondly, I never got children so that they could take care of me. I wanted to bring my children into this world so that they also could enjoy this thing called life and hopefully to make this world a better place in the process.
I think if your dad knew what you were thinking today, he would probably tell you..."Thanks you so much, but now...GO!...Go and make this world a better place.
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (25 November 2010):
 Talk to your mother about it and see what she thinks about it, ask her would she be able to cope and discuss when you will be available to come back and visit and give your mother a break, talk to her and see what she thinks. Also have you looked in to getting work in the new place as there is no point moving somewere that there is no available work for you and you run low in cash.
Also i understand that your daughter has moved in with her father but will you be close enough that she can come and visit or you go and visit her, believe me you dont want to lose contact with your own daughter, as that would just be devestating for both of you, every daughter needs her mother so dont run away from your responsibility and be there if she ever needs you to be.
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