Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Taps  +, writes (2 May 2011):
I would...He deserves to know. Anyone who's being cheated on deserves to know. Sucks to see good people not knowing they're being betrayed by the person they love and care for. Go for it...Give this Man a chance to get out of this and be with a better person.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2011): Unless you actually saw her cheat, you don't know for an absolute fact that she did. Have you heard men say they had sex with her? What is your actual evidence?
If you think the evidence is credible, I'd let her fiance know what it is that you've heard people say, providing as much detail as you can while still remaining anonymous. Let her fiance know the actual facts you are aware of (e.g. "X said on ___ that he went back to her place on ___ and ___'d her." Don't say "___ went to her place and ___'d her on ___").
Don't put yourself in the position of deciding if what you've heard is true. Let him know and let him decide what he believes. If she's doing this, her fiance deserves to know so he can decide what to do about it. It's ultimately up to him.
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male
reader, the_phoenic  +, writes (2 May 2011):
this girlmust have something wrong in her personalityand by stoping this marriage you are going to save this manand his possible family and children from veing decieved,but usually when a man is very inlove with a woman he wont listen to what others say about his GF/WIFEso youd better have some evidence or some people by your sideGood Luck
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female
reader, largentsgirl89 +, writes (1 May 2011):
 I personally would let him know that she is being unfaithful. Perhaps present some type of evidence if you have any so he knows you aren't joking or trying to pull some type of prank or sick joke.
I would want to know that the person I love and trust most in the world isn't who I think they are before I marry them. Especially since he is a police officer and spends his nights putting his life on the line.
Good luck to you and power to you.
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female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (1 May 2011):
 The answer to that is how would you feel if the tables were turned. If you were engaged to be married to a guy you thought was wonderful, and along comes this annoymous letter spelling out all the times he slept behind your back would you want to know?....Would you believe it, or just think someone who has a grudge against your dearly beloved is out for spite?.....There's nothing wrong with tipping him off annon. but just don't be shocked if he goes through with the wedding anyhow. Then again, her behavior will eventually catch up to her, then he'll connect the dots and realize the letter was real. Just make sure she doesn't get the mail first or figure out where it came from.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2011): Hhhhhmmmm this is a tough one. It all depends On ur relationship with these people.. Do u think he will believe u? Do u care whether or not u will be friends with them afterwards..i no ur intentions are good but sometimes gettin involved in others peoples business can only back fire on you! Is it worth it! Because if u say something and they still stay together then you will be looking lik the bad guy! Lik I said it all depends on ur relationship with both the bride and the groom. If u think he will appreciate u telling him, then go ahead because you could be saving him from making the biggest mistake of his life! Good luck! God Bless u!
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female
reader, matureflowerx +, writes (1 May 2011):
 I think you should let him know anonymously hopefully with names or as much proof as you could possible provide.
People always say "don't shoot the messenger" but most people do. Its very difficult to find out such life changing information and as far as I have experienced the messenger always looks bad.
She could also deny it and try to make you look like a crazy liar or something along those lines. But it would not be fair to allow this wedding to go ahead knowing what you know. The longer this charade carries on the longer it will hurt the poor man in the long run.
Please keep us posted on what you decide to do :) good luck
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female
reader, amenthyst3356 +, writes (1 May 2011):
I would do it and I hope someone would tell me if my fiancé was sleeping around. I would do it with some proof and also so no one could figure out who it is.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2011): that's a really tough one. one one hand, if i were the fiance, i would want to know. i would be devistated to find out everyone but me knew what was going on. but on the other hand, it is kind of none of your business what goes on in their relationship. when it all comes down to it, i would probably just keep my mouth shut. that is, unless this man is a close friend of yours.
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male
reader, LoveCanada  +, writes (1 May 2011):
I think you should let him know anonymously. Don't get urself exposed. It is better for him to know now before marraige. If he still marries her then he is going in with open eyes.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2011): Big question. I think if you are going to accuse her you better be DAMN sure you have proof. Especially if her fiance is a cop.
I think I'd like to know if I were in his shoes. Might save me alot of heart ache AND MONEY down the road.
I vote yes, tell him, but be prepared to back it up.
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 May 2011): Yes. Slip a note or make a phone call from a pay phone or somethin. Thats f****** awful. She doesnt deserve him.
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