A
female
age
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*eardg54
writes:i'am my exes secret lover now.we lived together for 6 yrs. he moved out a yr. ago, but we were still a couple. he met someone 4 months ago and still sees me when he can. he been lying to her from the start and won't tell her the truth about us. i told myself i can wait this out but it's getting hard. should i let her know about him? this is not fair to her or me. should i write a letter to her or let someone else tell her? i know he will come back if she broke up with him.
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broke up, moved out, my ex Reply to this Question
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female
reader, deardg54 +, writes (2 January 2011):
deardg54 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhi everyone,i just wanted to let everyone know that when i asked this question i had already stopped answering his calls,texts,and e-mail.i just needed assurance that i had made the right move.thank you everyone for your good advice.
A
female
reader, Fabulosa +, writes (1 January 2011):
 This doesn't sound like a guy that should have any girlfriend not less 2! He obviously doesn't love you or he would be with you and you alone. The question you should be asking is why do you want to be with him?
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A
female
reader, DEBB +, writes (1 January 2011):
I think that writting a letter to the "other woman" would just create animosity. She may think you are just trying to break up the relationship. I think you should just tell him that unless he is willing to commit to you and ONLY YOU, that the relationship is over. You deserve to have someone who loves you and is committed to you. Consider the REAL reasons he is still with the "other woman". I can't think of ANY good reason. It's time for him to "MAN UP" and stop playing with people's hearts.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2011): He has two women as lovers - whatever he makes you believe, he has sex/makes love and has feelings and loyalties to her too. EXCEPT, she's good enough to get status of "girlfriend" while you are hidden away and known to everyone as his ex. What a great place to be. The common denominator in all these men is the fact that they are liars. His relationship with you is built on lies - he has no respect for you and lies to you about his intentions. If you were truly what he wanted, he'd be only with you. Its that easy. Dump him.
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A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (1 January 2011):
 You are making yourself second best. Whilst ever he is seeing you both he is having his cake and eating it. Just dump him and if it's you he really wants, he will come back to just you. If you tell the other woman you are in danger of him never coming back to you, what if she won't let him go and he is angry at you for spilling all.
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