A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well, I'm a 17 year-old whom has been talking to a 20 year-old man. He's openly gay, trying to break stereotypes associated with gays, which really inspires me, and I really like him. I felt like we really connected with eachother, we both have similiar interesets in almost everything. This might be kind of dumb sounding, but he had me take the Myers Briggs Personality Test. I personally got INTJ while his is ENFP. INTJ's are ENFP's best match. Not really sure if I believe in that test, but whatever. Anyways, he's been avoiding me for some reason lately. I have two (count em', two!) possible explanations for this.1.) Although he said it first, I said "I love you." too soon.2.) He's kind of a hornball. I'm not.I feel like the only reason he talks to me now is when he's bored, drunk, high, ect. We haven't seen eachother once in the past week. He won't reply to anything. I've texted him, sent him messages over xbox, and whatever else. And it's not like I'm sending too many either, I've sent maybe 2 or 3 in the past week just saying "Hey man what's up?" Just trying to commence a conversation with him. He's driving me insane.I'm contemplating on just not having any contact with him anymore. Since I feel like I'm an escape to him from his boredom. But I feel like that would only hurt me. What should I do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 July 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all for taking the time to respond. I've stopped trying to talk to him, and we haven't spoke since.
A
male
reader, craig1973  +, writes (24 July 2012):
He sounds like an idiot who doesn't deserve your affection. If he doesn't have the guts to say he is not interested then he is not worth having as a friend either!
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A
female
reader, IamJess  +, writes (12 July 2012):
 The whole I love you thing could be enough to scare him, just scare though, I don't know if he's afraid of getting serious with anyone, or anything.
Don't feel you should be making effort with him when he's making zero back, especially only when he's drunk, sometimes that can imply its only when he has confidence to speak to you, but he should be speaking to you whilst he's sober aswell, let him make the next move if any at all.
Hope all works out.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (12 July 2012):
 I understand that you feel it will hurt you, but believe me it will hurt you more in the long term to keep trying to get in contact with this man. I can understand that you feel the both of you would make a great couple, and maybe you are right, but there is obviously reasons why he is avoiding your messages. To me I think it is ignorant that he does not just tell you what the problem is himself.
But please do not keep trying to contact him, yes I know you feel it will hurt you, but if he keeps ignoring you it will make you feel worse. At the end of the day harsh as it may sounds if he really cared about you then he would make the effort to contact you, which so far he has not. So for your own benefit don't contact him again, and if he is to get in contact with you, make it clear to him how he has made you feel by dismissing your messages, however something tells me not to hold your breath for him to get in touch with you. Be careful he doesn't try and use you. Good luck and all the best.
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