A
male
age
36-40,
*rickgomez
writes:About 3 weeks ago I met this girl in the school that I'm attending. Were both in the same program and taking the same classes. She has a baby that is 1 year old. We really hit it off from the beginning and the chemistry was great. The second week after I met her we had sex and from there everything just turn really awkward. Last week we talked and she said that since she just got out of a 4 year relationship and she didn't want a boyfriend at this moment but she really liked me and she wanted to get to know me. But at the same time she wanted to make sure that I didn't get my hopes up because she didn't know whether or not this would ever turn to something serious. Now my problem is that I really really like her but she is really stubborn and so am I and I feel like with her I'm always begging to see her and I'm a very proud person. I really don't know what to do at this point should I just let it go and just be friends or should I persist and give it more time to see if this turns out to something serious? Please keep in mind that I'm going to see this girl every single day in class for the next few months. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 December 2010): That something you really like is the sex. I think you should see other girls. It's going no where with this one and will probably leave you brokenhearted. The reason she treats you coolly at school and doesn't want anything to do with you is because she doesn't want the other guys to think she's with you. She's playing the field, hoping to meet someone else.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): First of all thank you all for replying. Let me make something clear we had sex again after we had the talk. Actually twice after that. But really this girl just seems confuse about what she wants umm it's not like I ever ask her to be my girlfriend or anything so when she said that it really caught me by surprise. She kind of just jump ahead on her own and picture some weird stuff in her mind. It's honestly very strange because at first she was very nice and like I said we hit it off right of the bat. But now when she is with her friends at school she acts like a b**** and she even told me that she doesn't want to hang out with me at school cause she wants time for herself to bond with her friends. But then when she's with me she acts like she's so into me. I don't know why I'm sticking around but there is something about her that I really liked from the beginning.
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A
female
reader, KRSMouse  +, writes (12 December 2010):
You've only known the girl 3 weeks, give it a chance! You have to remember that not only has she just come out of a 4 year relationship (so probably her emotions are all over the place) but she has a baby to consider. If you like her, then just get to know her as a friend and wait and see what happens! The fact she's told you she likes you is something, just don't rush her and she'll respect you for it later.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): I honestly don't think she's looking for a serious relationship. The fact that she slept with you, though you were little more than a stranger, shows that she was only looking for casual sex. She also told you straight out that she wasn't looking for a boyfriend. You will not be able to change her mind.
She obviously wants to play the field right now.
And I wouldn't push it if I were you. Certainly do not beg as that will get you nowhere and may even result in her withdrawing from the relationship completely. I think all you can do at this point is take it slow and see where it goes.
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A
female
reader, Haileyc21 +, writes (12 December 2010):
 It sounds to me as though she isn't all that interested. She might have been in the beginning. But taking things to another level may have complicated things for her. She might not have felt the "sparks fly" or so to speak, as she originally had expected... and she probably doesn't know how to tell you she's not interested. I would move on. Just stay friends with her but don't wait around until she gives you a say so. That's not fair to you! If she's stubborn, then she probably will never want to be in a serious relationship with you. I wouldn't get your hopes up just like she said. You deserve better than that. Sometimes things just don't work out the way you expect them to... but I wouldn't let that stop you from finding someone better!
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