A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ok i need help cuz my boyfriend wants to have anal but i dont know if i should. i want to know more stuff about anal before i do it. ive heard that it hurts alot and that their might be remains of poo on the condom when your done. then i also heard that after the first time it hurts to sit and go to the bathroom. is this true? what should i do? should i have anal with my boyfriend?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 August 2009): yes it does hurt but it feels good he will be albe to cum in it
A
female
reader, Olivia(Y).  +, writes (28 July 2009):
 Anal only hurts the first couple of times or if you are doing it wrong.
First off you need lots of lube which should help slide in easy.
You might get Remains of your dinner on the condom but surely if you two are mature enough to have sex you are mature enough to deal with a bit of poo, afterall it is a natural thing and if you wash there shouldn't be alot.
The key is to relax, if you don't like it you don't have to do it again. Try it :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2009): it is your choice.from experience anal sex feels wonderful and i prefer it to vaginal.it felt great first time too.just use lots of lube and keep relaxed.if you do that then you should enjoy it.to female anon before me many guys who want anal are not being selfish they want the woman to enjoy it too.and many men do have anal,gay or not using toys or the real thing.remember a mans g-spot is in the anus.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): i don't see what the craze is with anal sex! (Maybe porn is influencing peoples decisions?) A dick is not ment to fit into an anus, its meant to fit into the vagina!
Also, i don't pressume it gives females much pleasure, so it it just for the guys selfish pleasure! I have never tried it so i don't know if it hurts that much or not but i would never do that! not for a boyfriend not for anyone.
I wonder how many guys would like a dick up their ass? not many probably! so they shouldnt expect it of us either!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): It is entirely up to you if you want to try it. If you don't then say no. Done wrong (no or little lube, him going in too fast and deep, etc) will cause pain. However, if it is done correctly then it should not cause any lingering pain or bleeding. It will hurt just a little when he first enters. A thick lube must be used, not a liquid like K-Y liquid or Astroglide. The thinnest consistency lube that should be used is K-Y jelly in the tube or preferably a catheter lube, which is just a little thicker.
The other thing is how big your boyfriend is in thickness. If his penis is like 4.5 inches around then it should go pretty easily. If he is 5.5 inches or greater then it is probably going to hurt and be very tight. If you are really interested in doing it then it might help to get a dildo or butt plug that is somewhat smaller than him and use it yourself for a while. Use one that is smooth. Again, use lots of thick lube. It would also be a good idea to get one about as big around as he is to try yourself and to have him try on himself so that he understands how gentle he will need to be when he does it to you.
Things like anal sex and swallowing cum work best if the guy knows what it feels like or tastes like so that he can appreciate what it feels like to the woman. It's too bad that there is no real way for a woman to know what it feels like to a guy with our much higher testosterone levels to feel really horny. I read a discussion on a health board where a woman was prescribed too much testosterone by her doctor and she said that she now appreciated what it was like to be a young guy. Things like this are better with some appreciation of what it is like for the opposite sex.
Anal sex, either with a penis for the woman or an anal dildo for either sex can feel pretty good if done correctly. Done wrong can make it painful and a real turn-off. Here is one site that might help:
http://www.sexinfo101.com/ic_anal.shtml
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A
male
reader, Jamez +, writes (24 July 2009):
 just jump in! if it goes wrong then you'll never do it again but some girls love it so youve just got to find out!
just give a go, in a jacuzi or just with plenty of lube and go in with your fingers first.
james
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): every thing here is true, i had my girl try it for me and we did a little reserch b4 doing it as well one thing that led her to being ok with doing it was a special anal lube u can buy at a porn or sex shop. it will slighly numb the anus for u and u can apply as much as ud like for the day or two after. now because i respect my girl friend she didnt like it and we wont do it again but she did add that it was an experance shes glad she didnt miss out on... got to try every thing once...
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A
female
reader, MansonGroupie +, writes (24 July 2009):
 Hun, Yes, it can be very painful and yes, it can be messy.The fact that you're asking seems that you aren't so sure about this and I would definitely say that if you're not 100% positive that this is what you want, DO NOT do it!I believe that anal sex can be a very beautiful thing, if done correctly and with the right person.If you do decide to venture into the joys of 'bum-fun', your boyfriend will have to understand that it's not a quick process and he will also need to be prepared for the fact that he probably won't get it in the first time as you'll become too sore...especially if he goes at it like a bull in a china shop!Make sure (if you go ahead with it) that you have plenty of lube and are very relaxed before even attempting it.You will go to the loo straight afterwards and you'll probably be on there for a while, especially if you allow him to cum in your ass too.The first time I did it, I didn't know what to expect and as soon as it started, I felt as though I'd had a red-hot poker shoved up my arse...without warning!!! Ouch!To be honest, I'd say that you and your boyfriend should explore other avenues first to ensure that it's what you both really want.As k c100 said, the guy can get up and walk away afterwards with no side effects, he needs to understand and respect your decision, whatever that may be.Do what's right for you, nobody else. It's your body and ultimately your decision.xxx
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): Everything you heard is true, but there are ways to avoid that: proper lubrication and enema. Anal sex is just like having vaginal sex for the first time, it may or may not hurt. Some people enjoy it and others do not. I would suggest you try it to see if it's your thing or not. Happy safe sex.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (24 July 2009):
 KC 100 has given you some great advice. My only other suggestion is that you don't need to go straight to anal intercourse. The thing to remember is that he has an anus too, and it might help him understand what is entailed in anal intercourse if he were to be penetrated too. That way, he'll know how it feels if there isn't enough lubrication or care taken.
Start with fingers, VERY CLEAN fingers with short, clipped nails, lots of lube and experiment; latex gloves would be a good idea too. And under NO circumstances do you then take those fingers and put them in your vagina, understand? That can lead to some very nasty infections. Fecal matter = bacteria = bad to put inside warm moist environment of vagina. You must wash very thoroughly before touching other body parts. Hygiene is KEY.
Once he's had the experience of being anally penetrated, preferably with something the size of his penis, he'll understand what he must to to keep from hurting or injuring you.
Good luck. And remember, if you really don't want to do it, don't feel you have to. Just say "no, it doesn't work for me." He shouldn't be pressuring you for things you're uncomfortable with.
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A
female
reader, lm9hi +, writes (24 July 2009):
 I would recomend you dont do it, i did it ONCE and it was really horrible, it was also very sore, but their was a werid feeling, it just didnt feel right, there is other fun things to do rather than that, and yes even trying to sit on a seat after it hurt, i never experienced bleeding but thats not to say you wouldnt. If you are goin to take a few days of after it to recover, after it i felt like i was walking weird and everything and i was embarrassed to leave the house incase people could nottcie what i had done, if you do do it make an agreement with your boyfriend that if it gets to painful he will stop, if you do then i think it would be better, known that you can stop whenever you want :)
hope this helps :)
xx
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (24 July 2009):
 Everything you have heard is true! It would hurt a lot without proper lubrication, and even with lubrication it still hurts because it is pretty small if you know what I mean, and things just were not designed to go up there! It definately hurts to go to the bathroom for a few days after, and you can experience bleeding too.
I think if your boyfriend really wants it then if you are happy to give it a try then why not? I mean yes it does hurt and can be a bit gross but some women do enjoy it, you will just have to find out for yourself if you like it or not.
The problem is once your boyfriend tries it, the likelihood is that he will want it again (men like the tightness) and if you dont enjoy it then it will become a problem. He will want to keep trying and "will only do it for a minute" so you will feel bad because you are not giving him what he wants, so then you will try again thinking "it might not be so bad this time" but surprise surprise it still hurts and you still hate it.
I used to put up with it for my ex and looking back I wish I never did. It is uncomfortable, a bit disgusting and hurts for days after whereas the guy has no bad effects at all!
It is a very personal choice - some women do enjoy it but you have to make the decision whether it is worth trying it to find out what it is like or decide if you are really against the idea and dont want to do it.
Dont let your boyfriend push you into this - sex should be good enough for him without needing to go down the anal route. It is your body and you get to decide about this, not him.
I hope this helps!
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