A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been on and off with my current boyfriend for about five months now. It has been a really rough few months. There were two breakup periods but in the end I gave in and went back to him. He never once contacted or tried to be back with me, it was me that did all the pursuing after the break ups. I'm starting to doubt why I even went back to him - twice. The main problem is that he is not an attentive boyfriend. His thing is that he will see me when it is convenient for him (I haven't seen him in over a month now), he will call me when he feels like it (I haven't received a call from him in over a week now), and he doesn't even at least text me (to show he cares). It's like a one sided relationship where I'm constantly calling or texting him. Also, keep in mind this is not even a long distance relationship. I've talked to him about this so many times, how I'm unhappy that we don't spend more time together. Nowadays, I don't even say how I feel anymore because if I do he just takes what I say, twist it around to suit him, and puts the blame on me. For instance, I wanted him to come with me for something very important (as a support) this week, he told me he will come. On the last minute, he changed his mind and said that he couldn't make it. He knew this was very important to me but he blew me off without any kind of apology or trying to make it up to me. I didn't call or text him for a couple of days because I'm so angry, upset, and disappointed in him (even though... in my head I knew he probably would have blew me off anyways). I gave in and texted him a few days later just to say hi (and see if he felt any kind of remorse??) since I never heard any response from him since the day he blew me off. Of course, he turns it against me saying that I've been acting very strange with him lately (haven't called or texted him) and he didn't even respond to my texts back. He still hasn't called me. I'm just fed up with him. I feel like he is not a good person for me since he can't even keep his promises, support me, much less see me on a daily basis/be more attentive (at least act like a boyfriend!). I'm always the one who is pulling all the weight in the relationship and I'm just fed up with him. I've been nothing but nice, attentive, and respectful towards him but he always sees some sort of blame with me. I don't know what to do anymore to keep him happy or for him to be more attentive towards me. It doesn't seem like things are going to change (I've tried so many times), it's getting progressively worse.
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hasn't called, long distance, period, text Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for the advice. I've made up my mind and decided to end this relationship since nothing substantial is happening on his part to change or work on our relationship.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 June 2010): It sounds like he's giving you all the signs that he really doesn't care if you are with him or not.
Also, if you haven't seen him in a month that right there says a lot. Complaining about this just makes everything worse. Just move on with your life and find someone who actually wants to spend time with you and put the effort forth in having a relationship with you.
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A
female
reader, Foxylady  +, writes (20 June 2010):
 If you still love him give him sometime maybe he just have a problem right now so he need some space and time. Stop texting or contacting him. Maybe just seldomly you send him a message if he is alright and you still there for him if he needs you. Don't get mad coz you push him away from you. Just give him time and space that's my advice.. if you know his dating somebody will that;s another issue. but if not maybe he just need a space..Be positive your boyfriend loves you...:)
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 June 2010):
Yes, end it. At just five months, you should not be breaking up like this, and he's clearly not as interested as you are. Move on now.
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A
female
reader, Duckyhelp +, writes (20 June 2010):
 Just leave. He seems to not care so whats the point? There are plenty of better guys out there worth your kindness and wont have you feeling the way you do :)
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