A
female
age
36-40,
*enissia
writes:My friend says he loves me,he's been loving me for three years,his feelings never changed,but he cooled down somewhat because i never used to take him on. Now im madly in love with (just out of an abusive relationship) but i know its not a rebound,because i started thinking about him,while i was with my bf,so i only wanted to see this friend,he grew on me,so to speak. The only thing that is confusing me,he wants to make love with me,and im not ready,so he feels im still rejecting him,and he will back away,he says i had sex with other guys,an he still waited,he wants me soo bad that he cannot understand why im not ready. Should i give in,but i think he's being selfish. I WANT MARRAIGE,A RELATIONSHIP...he said because of how i treat him in the past,he doesnt want a realtionship yet,but he wants sex,i dont know wat to say... Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, C. Grant  +, writes (19 January 2011):
 You're welcome, hun. Take good care of yourself. :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2011): You should definatley leave him alone. He said he's not ready a realationship just sex that's a very bad sign. He has seen what you have went through and knows how far he can push you and that's what he's doing. You should definatley run the other way and stay single for awhile. You just got out of a long toxic relationship just explore the single life and make yourself happy. Last thing he will say whatever he can to get in your pants he a guy he thinks with his dick not his brain.
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A
female
reader, Denissia +, writes (18 January 2011):
Denissia is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank u,i will remain single and focus on my happiness,you have helped a whole lot....Yes my friend is hurting me and because im vulnerable he just thinks he should get a piece of the action,i was foolish to even wonder if i should,i should value my body,as a valuable temple and keep it pure,until someone who will truly treat me the i want to be trated comes along. I must prepare for my future husband,by keeping myself pure and having a closer relationship with God. Thank u Mr. Grant. All the best to u!!
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A
male
reader, C. Grant +, writes (18 January 2011):
You've answered your own question when you say you think he's being selfish. He's putting all kinds of pressure on you -- you had sex already with other guys, so why not with him?? As if losing your virginity somehow makes it right for him to disregard whether or not you're ready now, with him.
You say you're not on the rebound from your abusive relationship, but I wonder if you're really being straight with yourself. It takes a long time to heal. The fact that you say on the one hand you want a marriage, but on the other hand you "don't know what to say" to this guy?
Do yourself a favour and give yourself more time to heal before you get more involved with this guy. He doesn't sound sensitive enough to your situation to be decent relationship material.
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