A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello my name is Haibine, i've dating my bf two years, but he had a girl while he was with me but i didn't know that. when find out he told me he leave the i didnt trust him, i was cleaning his room and i find a letter the girl sent him, she told him why you never pick up my phone, i text you, you never text me back then i believe him. two weeks ago he calls me and told me that the girl pregnant by him, and asked me to marry him, am so confused, what should i do, i dont want him to bring her to the hospital or nothing, i'm only thinking about revenge like get pregnant too. please let me know your suggestion..
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female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (8 October 2010):
 You are only going to spite yourself if your fall pregnant - and who will pay the price - the innocent child.
Dump this miserable excuse for a man, get your life together and move on!
A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (8 October 2010):
 No, really. The mind just boggles.
How would that be revenge on the guy? It would be pretty much the worst thing you can do - to YOURSELF! Two stupid acts do not make 1 intelligent one. The best revenge for the guy might be to leave him and let him make his own bed of thorns, don't you think?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 October 2010): OK, he tells you another girl is pregnant by him and asks you to marry him all in the same phone call?! Don't use an innocent child as revenge against him-leaving him will be revenge enough. Especially once he realizes he's going to have to deal with this woman/child for the next 18+ years.
Move on and find a guy who would never cheat and loves you for real. You deserve that.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (8 October 2010):
 Tell me this: is inflicting a lifetime of emotional suffering (and, in all likelihood, poverty and abuse) on an innocent child an acceptable price to ruin one guy's day?
Do you really want to give him that much power over two people?
The best revenge would be to throw him out of your life and force him to deal with the fallout of his own mistakes, not make a mistake of your own. Find a better guy.
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A
female
reader, welshlamb83  +, writes (7 October 2010):
a baby wont trap him into a relationship with you and it wont fix it either, having babies with a loving partner is like showing the world an extension of your love for one and other and not to be used in bitter mind games sorry x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2010): Ummm No. What is there to suggest? ...Think more? Actually no, think less. (that rhymed btw)
Move on Haibine seriously, you don't need any of this drama. You're not in love with this guy because if you were you'd already have the answers you need. Plus he sounds like a boy chasing easy tail. Do you want to be easy tail? (Free babies for revenge open for business!)
Not happy to read this question at all, but I hope my blunt opinion helps you in some way.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (7 October 2010):
 "Honey, I have something to tell you about the reason you are here. Your father was a cheater and got another girl pregnant. I was so angry that I didn't want him to have anything to do with this girl or his child, and I had you in revenge. That's right, you are a child born from anger and a very dark place in my life.
"I would have liked to have been able to tell my child that he was made from love, by two people who love each other dearly and were committed to each other. It would have been nice to share all the joyous stories of how much we looked forward to your arrival, that we had planned it together and created a nursery and indeed, a whole life for you.
"I'm sorry to have to burst your bubble and tell you that the conception was deceitful, I lied to your father in order to get pregnant, so you were started on a lie, on anger, on revenge, on all the negative emotions.
"Not a very good start, my baby, was it?
"Maybe the best thing I could have done for you was to wait until tempers had cooled and I could think clearly, instead of in panic and anger, and I would have realized that perhaps this father wasn't the right one. That there was a better guy out there who wouldn't cheat and would be there for me in a way that meant we would be a stable and happy family. Maybe the best thing I could have done for you is to pick a better father and to have a chance to grow up and mature myself."
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (7 October 2010):
Get pregnant too! Are you mad!? Why would you bring an innocent little child into the world just for revenge. More to the point, why would you want to be with a guy like this? Do you really want a cheat and liar to be the father of your child? Unforgivable if you do. the one thing I judge harshly for is people who use their children like pawns in a game of chess.
You want to do the right thing? End it with this guy and move on. A child wont make anything better, it'll just make it worse on you and your child will not forgive being unloved and being treated like a tool.
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