A
male
age
41-50,
*ason32477
writes:I`m 32,my gf is 20.we have a 3 month old girl together.We have been living together for the past year mostly at her mothers until she kicked us out.So for the past month I have been trying to get my trailer situated.She has been staying with me all this time but she keeps finding reasons to go back to her moms for a week at a time.wanted her to move her doctors,and the babys doctors and all other stuff out here so everything isnt a 2 hour drive.She has refused.She just came back to my place after spending 12 days at her moms,and we have a big fight about this issue as she is still saving up for her project house 2 hours away from me.I figure shes living here that money would be better spend going in this house.Monday morning ( I just went and got her Thursday) she tells me shes going home she hates my family.I basically say if you leave here your leaving me.Monday when I get home from work she tells me how shes got a dentist appointment Tuesday.So now she has a surprise valid excuses.And I`m totally in raged.So when I calm myself down I offer to get out of work early to take her as opposed to her plan of staying at her moms for 3 weeks.She refused to let me take her,and said she would cancel her appointment.Today I get home and all her stuff is gone except the computer I`m using now because she wanted to talk to me.(no phone till next week,I just started working when i moved back out here).I love her,and I love my baby girl,but this is too much for me to handle and I broke up with her.Am I wrong?our last words .....Her: i dont see why u needed me there for the 21 days id be gone./.Me: and if i wont need you for 21 days why would i ever need you?Her: wtf!Her: fine if u think like that i dont want u!Me: goodMe: now maybe you see my pointMe: and why i want to end it allHer: no i dont?!Her: i will just leave u alone!Her: good bye.
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female
reader, Ilovemyoreo2010 +, writes (27 March 2011):
 i do love you!! i dont care what u think! i never stop thinking about you! i never stop asking myself what if. not a day goes by that i look at our daughter and think oh we r better off without him! i miss you! i love you. and there is nothing i would rather do than take all the bad things back. i wish i never would have left i had no reason other than hating ur family. i always felt that they were going to try and take her from us i was so scared. even tho u tried to tell me that it wouldnt happen i was still scared! i dont want to live without her! i dont want to live without u but u've moved on and now i feel like we will never have u back! if i knew how to fix this i would! i know ur not going to just leave her for us. and i dont want you to. i just want you to know that im sorry. i still love you.
A
male
reader, Jason32477 +, writes (27 May 2010):
Jason32477 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Because of your answers I opened a line of communication and we came to a compromise.(All my friends and family I talked to said I was doing the right thing, but I put more trust in the outside opinion.)I`ll pick her up this weekend and will try to find another place when we get caught up giving a rough time frame of around 2 months.When we do she will give hers up.And she is going to find a new baby doctor.I live close to my mom and my aunt`s houses.Both in sight of mine out in the country.There is only 1 other house around.Me and my mom are no longer on speaking terms because she don`t like my gf.I have been getting a lot of help from my aunt`s bf including him doing work on my house and letting me run power from his place.Been trying to get my power on for a while now and best guess is 2 weeks away.I just lack a foundation sticker and have someone doing that work,he was here today,might finish tomorrow.I don`t like the idea of giving up a place with no rent,and after all the money i`m just finishing pouring into it.But I can understand her point and would do anything with in reason to make this relationship work.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (26 May 2010):
 Unfortunately, this time it is the age difference. she's 20, you're 32. You're ready to settle down and build a future, and she's not even ready to leave her mom's house. She hates your family, and I'm thinking that since her mom kicked you out, things are kinda tense there too.
I don't know what to say, except stay involved in your little baby girl's life and hopefully one day the 20 year old will grow up and cut the apron strings someday.
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A
female
reader, cnith +, writes (26 May 2010):
 I'm amazed that a 30 something year old man is writing like a 13 yr old boy... Honestly, the IM thing doesn't impress me at all. But I'll put that aside a moment.What does "I hate your family" mean? I thought you were living alone. Did you try couples counseling?There's a reason she doesn't want to be there with you. What is it? She didn't tell you or you didn't hear/listen to her?Try it again without fighting. Tell her what you told us. You want her and you want your baby with you as a family. What's it going to take for that to happen? Maybe she doesnt want to be that far away from her own family. Can you compromise? I think most things can be worked out. I hope for your baby's sake, it does.But a word of advise... can you please drop the IM talk and speak like a grown up? I realise you're p o'd and hurt but regressing helps no one. Especially if your girl is young too. You two need to grow up. For the baby's sake.
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