A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I've been friends with benefits with this guy i've known since school for like 3 months now. We text each other constantly and are always talking to each other. We see each other about 3/4 times a week and when we're not with each other we are texting.We told each other we like each other but I fear I may be in love with him. When we're together we hold hands cuddle kiss and act like a couple. He knows I want more and how I feel but he says he doesn't want a girlfriend and doesn't want too commit. I know he likes me too because he tells me and he recently told me he was jealous when I kissed another guy. I really don't know what to do. It upsets me, the fact he doesn't want me as his girlfriend, but I'll miss him soo much if I stop seeing him :( should I end all ties?
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (24 October 2011):
 He will break your heart and it will hurt him deeply. Yes he cares and he likes you BUT NOT THE WAY YOU WANT and NEED.
you will never be girlfriend material to him because if you were he would already be there with you. He will find someone else that falls instantly into the "girlfriend zone" and poof you will be on the back burner.
advice: leave while YOU have the control.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks everyone xxx
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A
male
reader, serenity80 +, writes (24 October 2011):
Do a search on this website for FWB. I think this will answer your questions.
This guy will never see you as 'girlfriend' material, which is why he hasn't pursued you in these few months. You are 'casual shag' material and this the most you will ever be, to him.
If you want to be seen as a girlfriend, you should end all ties with this guy, and the next time a guy who comes along who you like, take things slowly and don't sleep with him until he has shown he wants to be your boyfriend. If you act easy, people will treat you as if you're easy.
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A
female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (24 October 2011):
 Well friends with bennifits simply means friend you can have sex with and thats it and from what ive heard this does sound like you both have slight feelings for eachother.
You are ovbiously very attached to him now and if he is acting like that towards you i can see why i guess i can give you three solutions.
1. Talk to him about the way you feel say that you have feelings for him and that you think you love him (i know you may of done this before) tell him that because you have gotten so close you think of him more than just a fwb ask him if maybe you can move things together and if you can't your gonna have to end this as you can't handle getting any closer to him than you already have, then let him decide.
2. Tell him that you have become attached to him because of all the kissing and cuddleing and it feels like your an acutal couple tell him that you want to carry on being fwbs but just for the sex and you don't want any mushy affectonate stuff or its gonna make it hard for you not to fall in love with him.
3. Tell him that its over say you don't want to be fwb anymore stop calling him and contacting him (this solution will defointly stop you from falling for him anymore) say your sorry but you can't bear to get any closer to him than you already have end it there and move on (also if he keeps trying to contact you this could make him realize how much he misses you and if he doesnt contact you anymore its ovbious he was just in it for the sex)
Well theres the solutions now you just got to pick one good luck!
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A
female
reader, Read-the-signs +, writes (24 October 2011):
For your own sake, end it. He either likes you enough to be your partner or he's just using you for sex and attention. Sadly, it looks like the latter. x
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