A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:There's this girl that I met about about 6 weeks ago. We've dated for about 3 weeks and we really seemed to click. We have so much in common it's crazy. We liked the same things etc. Then things came up, we didnt spend much time together, she said she was busy with school ( I thought she was giving me excuses but I found out they were legit) Then she went home one weekend and then went with her roommate to her hometown the next weekend. (we're in college) I asked her to come over today for dinner and she had some meetings and a test to study for. I then asked her was she avoiding me and she told me she really wants to focus on school this semester (she's a freshman it can't really be that hard and that her priority is school and not on boys I hope you're not mad ( oh yeah I'm not mad at all ) She said she thinks she shouldn't be in a relationship right now and she still really wants to be friends but she wants to focus on school and not feel obligated to do anything else. I tried to get a straight answer from her when I said "what you are really saying is that you dont want to be in a relationship with me now" and she said it's not just me she doesnt want to be in a relationship at all I can't do it right now. I then told her I don't know if I want to be your friend because I have feelings for her and I don't want to get hurt and that if you're saying that you want to take it slow or you always want to be just friends and she said she want to be just friends right now and see where it goes from there. I reluctantly said ok. I don't know what to do, should I just try to be her friend and see where it goes or just cut her off completely? I don't want to try put any work into something where there's no hope of us ever being together. Was she just being nice or was what she was saying truthful? She seemed pretty persistent at us still being friends and wanting to hang out.
View related questions:
roommate Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (20 October 2009):
She's focusing on her studies, so that's it on the romantic front I'm afraid. I think you're being sensible wanting to step away from her, because if she only ends up seeing you as a friend, then you're going to be left hurt. Say to her that you resect that she wants to focus on her work, but you need to be able to have to the time to get over her and need to move on, and for your own sake need to stop contact. Don't end up in the friend zone where you'll only be hurt.
|
