A
female
age
30-35,
*ylassie10
writes: I have been hanging out with a guy i met at college for about 3 months and we just started kissing and cuddling and getting comfortable. He likes me but hes still kinda hard to read on how much he does and what exactly he wants but he has said he wants to take it slow but he likes me a lot and hes moving in the direction of wanting to be bf and gf but he knows im not ready. I like him but I dont really like him enough to make him my bf. I care about him and i wouldnt want to hurt him or decide to change my mind. We have a lot in common and enjoy similar things and hes different than many guys ive met recently. But sometimes I feel like there is someone else out there that I could like more and have strong feelings for but I havent met them yet. I only see him about once or twice a week so I feel like i dont spend enough time with him to let myself like him more even though i have gotten to know him pretty well. I really want to like him and ill continue hanging out with him for a while and maybe ill feel different but idk something is stopping me from fully opening up. One part is that he doesnt express how he feels very well unless i ask and two this is new to me. Ive never had a bf and he was my first kiss but i didnt really feel anything. When he kisses me and kisses my neck and stomach it doesnt turn me on. But i do get excited when he calls and would probably get jealous if he were to see another girl but maybe thats just because I like the attention. Does this mean I dont like him that much that I should stop hanging out with him now even though I would miss him but maybe it would be better before he really had strong feelings for me or should I give it some more time and try to get to know him more and see if feelings develop? I talked to him about this and he seems to be confused about how i feel and he didnt know what to say but I dont know exactly how to make it clear either.
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female
reader, mylassie10 +, writes (9 April 2009):
mylassie10 is verified as being by the original poster of the question Hey thank you very much for responding. Id say your answer is right on point. I cant bring myself to do it yet but i will soon.
A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (9 April 2009):
 I think it is clear that you dont really like this guy more than as a friend and he is starting to develop feelings for you - the kindest thing you can do is just tell him you only like him as a friend and stop seeing him as much (and when you do see him, no kissing etc).
By the sounds of it, you are only spending time with him for the attention rather than because of the attraction to him - missing him and feeling jealous if he got with another girl will only come because you like the fact he likes you. It is always nice to feel wanted - but you are not feeling anything more for this guy than that.
I think you should be honest with him and just tell him you dont like him in "that" way. I know it will be hard and he will be upset but it is kinder to do it now than lead him on. If you carry on like this then he will only fall for you harder so things will get worse!
You need to wait for a guy that really knocks you off your feet, someone who you are crazy about and cant stop thinking about. I understand that you may want someone right now but it will be worth it if you wait a little longer for your perfect guy to come along.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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