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Should I call him asking why? Or leave it?

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Question - (12 February 2009) 2 Answers - (Newest, 13 February 2009)
A female South Africa age 41-50, *licia writes:

I live in another country and my family in my home country.My dad introduced me 2 a man when i went home 4 christmas and told me that he lived in the same town as me.We exchanged business cards.he told me he will call me whn he is in town.When i got back home i emailed him.He responded and started calling me everyday and sending msgs.I considered him a friend and nothing more coz i am in a relationship.So i decided i would tell him of this if he visited. When he was came he called me at 10pm on a thursday wanting 2 come and c me for a minute.Told no coz it was late and we shud meet the next day was work so maybe we should rather meet on the friday.He didnt and went back home.He then called sayin it seemed like i wasnt interested so he didnt call again.After that call he hasnt contacted me.Should i call him asking why or leave him alone?What do i do?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2009):

You are already in a relationship, to begin with. It probably would have been better to have told him that before he started phoning you and sending messages every day - for instance, if he sent you a couple messages and called more than once, THAT was the time to let him know you have a boyfriend.

I must admit I don't care for the fact that he called you at 10 in the evening and wanted to come to where you live to see you "for a minute." Not a good idea. He'd have done better to have agreed to meet you for coffee or lunch......anyway, he's out of your life now, and I personally think you'd do better to let it go......

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A male reader, anoms United Kingdom +, writes (12 February 2009):

anoms agony aunti think you know the answer, dont lead him on if your already taken, if your splitting with your partner then by all means otherwise your knowingly getting into deep water

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