A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I'm only fifteen and about two years ago I had the biggest crush on this boy, we will call him Alex, but he did not like me back. I was sad for a really really long time and I just could not seem to get over him. I started to date another guy foolishly because I thought it would help me get over him. We will call him Justin. We dated for about four months and I dumped him because Alex told me that he liked me. Alex and I sort of dated for about a week but I wanted Justin back, so I got back together with him last week. He asked me if I was in the relationship for the long haul and I said yes. I thought I meant it too, but I am still doubting it. Last night I was riding the bus home from a band competition and I sat with Alex. It was dark and I still like him and everyone on the bus was tired so most people were sleeping. We slowly sunk down into our seats and just looked at each other for a while. He looked straight in to my eyes and put his hand on my cheek and he started to kiss me. We kind of had our own little make out session on the bus and I liked it a lot. We did it like three times because it was like a four hour bus ride. I hate what I am doing to Justin but he wants to be with me for the rest of his life and he's 18 but I'm 15 and he really is a great guy, but it is a little bit scary and he is just my first boyfriend and I want to have relationship experience before I get married. I also want him to have someone better because he is a really good christian and I am not. I can't tell Justin that I made out with Alex and I really can't dump Justin again because I told him that I was in the relationship for the long haul. I really don't know what to do. I don't want to be a skank but I already am. I'm not a horrible person and I get straight A's but I make mistakes too. I just really do not know what to do. What would you do if you were in my situation?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Aunt ~ Em  +, writes (27 October 2008):
 Wow, I've been there and it's hard hun.
But the fact is, if you don't think you're suited for "Justin" then there's no point in stringing him along. You need to tell him that you've had feelings for someone else, and just sit him down and explain that you're not ready for a long-term, committed relationship. Tell him that you seriously thought you were, and that you do like him... In fact. Just tell him everything you wrote up there. Be gentle and suffer the consequences lol. He's going to be upset and angry which is natural. But you're both young and it will not be the end of the world. Be honest and open and sympathetic.
Good luck.
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