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age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I need to get advice and other women's point of view on my current situation....my partner watches porn and downloads videos on both the PC and his mobile, which he thinks he keeps secret from me, when i find it and confront him he lies to my face about even doing it!And tries to tell me that he didn't do it, im also nearly 7 months pregnant and have been trying to find out why he feels he needs to watch this quiet explicit material, what i could or should be doing in bedroom ect.He was diagnosed with chrones disease approx 2 years and since then we hardly ever have sex, he gets annoyed when i try to get him to be intimate with me, which is always humiliating for me, ive tried telling him this but he just brushes it off like its nothing and nothings is wrong,ive asked him not to do it as it makes me feels unwanted, unloved and pushed aside to someone who is obviously better looking with a better figure and makes me feel like he doesn't want to be with me, ive told him how i feel but again this get brushed off, or he tells me that i make him feel inadequate... im really at my wits ends with how to rectify this as i dont know if i should be as offended as i am or wether im being overly sensitive about his, fast coming, obsession.he is also hides his facebook page from me, doesnt tell me who he talks to when i try to take an interest, thinking maybe i could get close to him that way....i try to get involved in what he does, football ect but i feel like im getting nowhere, and he can swan off and do as he pleases when he likes....In the last 6 months he has been away 5 times with out me, to places i cant go as im pregnant but sees nothing wrong wanting to go away, dispite leaving me at home on my own. He has made plans to go to a festival, which is only 2 weeks before im due to go into labour which again, he sees nothing wrong with (even though its a 3 hour drive away from us)he writes things on forums to other women like 'i want to meet you all' but doesnt see anything wrong with this as he says he is just chatting to other people, and makes me feel like im losing me mind....i feel very depressed and really need input from other people....any advice is welcome....thank you
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2010): I am male and trust me gone through similar situations of your husband many many times.
I have a different view for you.
Just don't listen to anyone else but be judge for your self.
As for me he has not committed anything seriously wrong as of now but trying to get into there. He need a change in his life and it's your BABY!
Imagine if he looks at your baby's face and all the fancy lifestyle will fly away from his mind. He will evantually become a busy father and spend more time with his kind and with you.
Take your time and don't rush into conclusions.Keep him update on your baby's growth and future plans of grooming the baby. That will bring him closer to you.
A
female
reader, person12345  +, writes (12 June 2010):
 I'm not sure this a porn problem so much as an insensitive jerk problem. You're not losing your mind at all, he sounds like he wants to cheat on you if he isn't already. Why would he be so secretive about his facebook and such? And telling women he wants to meet them, that's really crossing the line. I'm really sorry to tell you this but I don't think your relationship will continue happily for you. I know you're pregnant, but I suggest you stay with a friend or relative until the baby is born to reassess.
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A
female
reader, tmisty777 +, writes (11 June 2010):
 Wow, I may be kind of young t answer this question because I've never had to deal with this, but I say that he shouldn't watchor look at porn. Give him one week to get off of it- I made my boyfriend get off of it and he did i right away. Tell him that i bothers you, and if he says that there's nothing wrong with it tell him that there obviously is if it bothers you. Ifhe doesn't care about the way you feel, you need to find someone else. He's going out all of the time- he's going to be like that when he's a father. There are many single parents out there, I'm sure that you will be able to go along with it and you will be able to find someone better for you and you will be much happier to get someone who listens to you! Tell him that the relationship is falling, and he needs to pick it up!If he wants to meet other girls, tel him that he can- and leave you out of it, you're nt going to be apart of him anymore. You may have a baby comming, but do you really want to raise it in a family that has a relationship such as you and your man? Bring him/her in a more loving and happy environment!Porn though- no. You may love him, but there is a diffeence of love and being in love, and heobviously isn't in love wit you. If he wants to try it out later, you will have more control over the situation- tell him no more facebook, no myspace, and that he becomes a lover, a mate, faithful, more secure about himself, and a father.Hope my answer helped, I hate having problems in relatonships. Sorry for the situation, still, if nohing happens it will aways stay the same, do you want to live with that forever?
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