A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've had an emontional relationship with a guy at work for nearly a year. We've never been too physical with each other because I was married and he had a gf. We've been good friends for almost tow years. But within the last year things have been more than friends should be. We've never even kissed, but we do give each other back rubs, hold hands and hug a lot! I'm going through a nasty divorce right now and he is there for me. But he seems to have no interest in leaving his gf like he has said in the past he would if I got divorced. I'm not sure if he's actually going to do it. Every time I bring it up he always tells me "things will come in time." I'm not asking him to leave her today or anything, I just think I'm entitled to an estimate of "if" and "when." His gf s just not right for him. Everyone I work with says they are jelous of the chemistry we have and that we should be together. Should I assume its never going to happen, or should I wait a little longer? Do you think he's just waiting for my divorce to be final?
View related questions:
at work, divorce, I work with Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Mels  +, writes (31 January 2009):
You should wait a little longer, deal with your divorce first and then worry about the new relationship. Don't make your divorce more messy then it is getting somebody else involved.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2009): I think you both sound like cheaters.....he is cheating on his girlfriend and you want to win him away from her? You cheated on your husband, and he wants to be with you?
Relationships that start during infidelity and end up with the two of you together have a less than 1% chance of surving more than a year.....psychological research has shown this to be the case.
Everyone at work is jealous of your chemistry and says you two should be together? That is the most ridiculous thing I have ever heard....what maybe a couple of girls in the office think so? I seriously doubt that everyone thinks this, in fact I am sure of it and I don't even know where you work. Usually, people have very negative reactions to office affairs when one or both people are already married, it just isn't right to do that......morally reprehinsible.
I think you should get on with your nasty divorce, get your life back together as a single woman and start dating some men that are available and not already in a relationship with someone else. This guy is clearly not interested in you....he isn't going to leave his girlfriend becuase you think she isn't right for him, but you are......love is not about a competition after all....
It is about trust, fidelity, commitment and common goals and values......not sneaking around.
...............................
|
