A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi guys. I happen to have a huge crush on my hair stylist (no, he is not gay) and I REALLY need some help.He and I talk a lot everytime I go there and have become sort of friends, or at least that's how I see it. The last time I went there we started talking about relationships and I finally managed to ask him if he has a girlfriend, and he said that he's single at the moment (I was so excited). I let him know I'm single as well, and he talked to me about problems he's had with girls before and I did the same. It was like I had known him forever. We even found out we have the silliest things in common! It was scary. We kept finishing each other's sentenses. It got to the point where he was laughing and telling me "You're joking, right?" while we found out just how much we had in common. And at some point he said "Wow, I feel really comfortable talking to you"While I was telling him about my ex boyfriend, he suddenly asked me if he was around my age. My friend who was there says he might have said that to see if I'm okay dating older guys (I'm 18 and he's 24) but I really don't know. What do you think?And he's also said some stuff that swing to the flirty side. We were talking about the deserts we like the best (we ended up having the same favourite ones) and then about making them, and I said jokingly "Well I avoid preparing sweet stuff, because I'll eat the whole thing for sure" and he said "Well even if you do, you don't need it. You don't even need to go to the gym" And I kind of blushed then. Also - he randomly puts his hand on my shoulders, waist, arm while talking to me. I hope that's a positive sign.Well, so, I REALLY want to ask him out but his job gets in the way. I suppose I'd probably get him in trouble by giving him my number in the salon or something. Another thing, he's 24 and I'm 18, do you think that would tick him off, seeing as I'm younger? And I do not KNOW how to ask for his number while in the salon. Or tell him to go out sometime.Please help! What do you think I should do? Also, do you think something could happen between us even if I started off as a customer, or is that a bad sign
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crush, flirt, has a girlfriend, my ex Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 May 2010): Please please please don't! If anything keep up the flirting. But know that you are NOT the only girl he flirts with. They flirt with all of there client who they find attractive. It is an ego boost and it ensures they might get a good tip or that you will return. He's not way too old for you but it's a slippery situation because he's likely to just use you as a passing fancy. Keep the control. Don't get your heart broken. Wait it out make sure he's begging you for the date if you really decide you want it go out with him so you know for sure it's not bs. I date a mal hair stylist but I was never his client first and I know what these guys are like and I hear stories about them all the time. Please just be safe.
A
male
reader, sampson +, writes (27 April 2010):
i have worked in a hairdressers and they tend not to date their customers, because if you break up you are less likly to get your hair cut their. . .possible say bad things about him and lose him customers and there for cash, [word of mouth is important in the beauty industry]. And would you expect free hair cut when you are going out?
but the heart wants what the heart wants.
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A
female
reader, mizz.butterflies  +, writes (26 April 2010):
 tell him u wanna shop for ur cousins birthday and u would like him to come with you.lol hehe.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2010): yeah, i think u have a really good chance there. u should just play it cool and ask him if hed like to continue this conversation with a drink somewhere. im sure hed say yes because u guys seem to get along really well as friends and hed be confused whether or not it was an innocent date or a romantic date. once ure out of his job setting im sure hed open up more and be way more flirtacious since he prob tons it down when hes at work. so go for it! u only have on life so make the most of it. and there is no prob out all between the age difference. most guys like to date younger women anyway. good luck!
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A
male
reader, bruce lee  +, writes (26 April 2010):
 I'm not going to read the whole thing. This is a VERY long question. But...I think you should not ask him out unless he gives some VERY obvious signs that he is attracted to you. You wouldn't want to make a fool out of yourself, would you?
By the way, it's good that he is not gay. But I suffer from homophobia (it's now a recognised medical condition) and I'm wondering if you have any tips for me on how I can overcome this.
I often worry about being gay. I don't think I am. But it's a really scarey feeling, and I need advice on how to reduce my anxiety. It is just a phase I am going through. I get really nervous around other guys because I am scared that they can read my thoughts. And if they sense that I have homophobia, they are going to wonder if I'm gay.
And that makes the anxiety worse.
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