A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have a question for Males out there. I have been dating this guy for 5 months, and I completely felt in love with him over the past few months. I recently bought a house and a Male friend is helping with the renovation. My current boyfriend has offered to help me but he has a full time job and it has been hard for him to work on the house. My male friend has been helping a lot. He has gone out of his way to help me. Now, my current boyfriend seems to be a little be uncomfortable about it. He hasn't said anything, but I can tell he is not comfortable. For example, when I tell him my friend was with me the entire time during renovation he will replied " isn't he working? " content he have a job"? I don't like lying so I tell my boyfriend everything; but I get a feeling that when I tell him I am with my friend he acts a little bit different and uncomfortable. My friend is a good looking guy and single; but we are not attracted to each other at all. He used to date my best friend and that's how we met.I guess my question is: Should I ask my boyfriend if he is uncomfortable that my male friend has been helping me a lot? Am I overreacting? Do guys get jealous ?
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female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (26 August 2015):
 How long are these renovations likely to take? Are they on schedule? Will this friend be doing all of them or just certain parts?
Are there things you can do yourself or have someone else do instead of always this one friend? I realise he's saving you money (assuming he's doing this for free or at a reduced rate) but paying a little extra or putting more of your own elbow grease into it might go a long way to restoring peace with your boyfriend. Don't put yourself in the poor house or work yourself to exhaustion though.
If your boyfriend knew this was a finite thing, the approximate date when it will end and not something that will linger into forever, he might feel more comfortable.
A
male
reader, Peterk5699  +, writes (26 August 2015):
 If your boyfriend hasn't brought the subject up at any time I don't think there is any need to bring it up yourself.
There's a chance that he might just be upset that he can't spend this time with you and your best friend is "compensating," so to speak, making him feel a bit jealous that it can't be him instead (so yes, guys do get jealous, it's what makes us so annoying).
Maybe as a way to show that your interest lays with your boyfriend only, cook a meal for or with him and make the night just you and him by showing that you have love only for him.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 August 2015): Good grief, let’s stop beating about the bush! Let’s put the shoe on the other foot. Suppose he bought a house and he’s got this stacked, good looking, single woman helping him fix it. Would you be jealous? Darn right! Do guys get jealous – darn right they do. The helper has free access to your attention and your house – that’s rather personal. So it is a big deal to the BF.Okay, so you love him to pieces and you can see he is uncomfortable, but you don’t say anything to make him comfortable? Why the heck not?? For heavens sake do talk to him and explain. Don’t beat about the bush, talk about how he’s feeling and how you feel – that’s what you do if you love someone. One little conversation could make a world of difference.You will be under-reacting if you do not clear the air.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (26 August 2015):
 "Should I ask my boyfriend if he is uncomfortable...?"
I would not. Why go looking for trouble. If he's that uncomfortable he should say something. But if he's that uncomfortable maybe he's insecure or inappropriate.
"Am I overreacting?"
I don't know if it's "over reacting" I think you are over thinking it.
"do guys get jealous"
some do. IF they do and there is no cause for it then it's possible that their jealousy is a sign that they are insecure or have low self-esteem or double standards. Jealousy is NOT a good emotion to use to determine if a person cares about you or is in love with you.
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A
male
reader, BazingaToZulus +, writes (26 August 2015):
 To answer your first question, it wouldn't be a bad idea to casually bring it up in a conversation. It's not really a big thing depending on your perspectives (both of you), how you approach the subject and when you decide to do it. People who react like this (no poker face at all you know, emotions splattered on their faces) tend to gravitate towards a state of mind that is, well...counter productive in a very short time if you don't go to the source right from the start. As an example take for instance the little remarks he made, well when people do that at the start of a relationship for the same reason he did, it's not an unresolved issue you two had in the past that kept on festering over months or years that was the catalyst for him acting this way. It's within himself, it could be from a bad experience, general insecurity or anxiety or some other thing. So my opinion is, you should have a talk with him and explain it the same way you wrote it here, it's not a big problem now but you have to address it before it becomes one. I don't think you're overreacting, it's obvious you really like this man and you're just concerned for the well being of your future relationship, it's normal.And, I'm not trying to be funny but, have you met a lot of different guys in the past? No I'm kidding but yeah guys get jealous just as often as women do. I Hope It helped you in some way, good luck and have a great day!
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