A
male
age
41-50,
* R
writes:Got a bit of a dilemaHad the same girlfriend for 7 years. But in the summer see went around the world for a year. At first I was fine with it and was happy that she was doing something she wanted to do.But last week I meet a lass, and I haven't been able to get her out of my head. Can't work properly etc. I have always been faithful to my girlfriend.What should I do to sort this feeling out.Should I ask this lass out that I meet last week. See how it goes? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2007): Hi, I agree with Eve below....I think you are very young to be in a 7 year relationship, you may not know who you really are apart from being in this couple....and you deserve a chance to find out what truly makes you happy and what you might value in a mate or girlfriend.....It is possible that things will not be the same anyway once she has returned, which is not always a bad thing, but it may dissapoint you in some way as well. I think it is unrealistic to expect anyone not to date others if you are apart for a year....So I say go for the other girl, you don't have to get serious, just date her and get to know her first and most importantly, enjoy yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): how long till she comes back? a year is a long time and if you're about half way through that then you should maybe hold out unless you are 100% sure that you and the girl are right for eachother. if you leave eachother then no doubt your old girl will find out and things will get tense. A year IS a long time, and maybe you are only interested in this other girl because you want the other one back. although a year is ages, 7 years are longer. don't lose 7 years in a month. think about it first.
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (9 October 2007):
 A year is a long time to be away from someone. Seems to me she's pretty much your first love. If I were you then yes, I would ask her out and see how it goes. Keep things on a friendly basis until you are more sure of your feelings for her and if it turns out that you BOTH feel the same then I say go for it. Sometimes, when we meet someone so young and go with them for a number of years, the relationship becomes more of a habit than anything else. It might turn out that after her year away she'll be a different person anyway and won't want the same things in life as you do so I certainly wouldn't pass the chance up of getting to know this other girl better.
If she's not what you thought then hey, nothing lost but if you do get on famously and want more with her then go for it. Only THEN let the girlfriend know that you're setting her "free".
Good luck and keep me posted.
Eve
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