A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 13 year old female and I'm dating a 16 year old guy.. I think I'm in love but I don't know if that's wrong. I mean my friends say that we are cute and my parents say that it's wrong because of the age difference. All I wanna know is if it's wrong.. Please answer Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 September 2016): Congratulations young lady, you are showing more (real) maturity than most teenage girls who want an older guy.
It does not take maturity to want an older guy. That just takes hormones. It takes more actual maturity for you to hold back on that urge because you understand its not right for you.
The younger you are, the more the age difference matters. 33 and 36 years old is nothing but 13 and 16 years old is a huge difference. You are at different stages in life.
A
male
reader, Serpico  +, writes (10 September 2016):
.5M +7. It always works.
So at 16, the youngest he should be dating is 15.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (10 September 2016):
 I think it's not a good thing. A 16-year-old boy/girl should be MORE mature and thus want to date a peer, not a person 3 years younger.
Would YOU date a 10-year-old? Seriously? My guess is no, right? So apply that to a 13-year-old and a 16-year-old.
A 16-year-old is also further into his/her puberty and you at 13 have barely begun. Which again makes it iffy to me. A 16-year-old boy will want to explore his budding sexuality and a 13-year-old.. is barely there, nor ready for that mentally or physically. But a 13-year-old girl MIGHT fall for "pressure" from a 16-year-old to do things she really isn't ready for.
And IF that happens HE (the 16-year-old) will land in a LOT of hot water, legally.
If you were 18 and he was 21, I'd say it's just fine. If you were 21 and he was 24, fine too. But 13 and 16? No.
Which is why I think you should NOT enter a relationship with a 16-year-old when you are only 13.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2016): I think legally he's probably too old, but I disagree about him being more mature. It depends on the kids.
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (10 September 2016):
 Yes, it's wrong. I was in your shoes once with a crush on a seventeen year old and I had just turned fourteen. Three years might not seem like much but: he's in high school, has high school friends, is able to stay out late, is able to work, is able to drive. What can you do? Is your life the same? He's been through more and knows more. Teenage boys at that age rarely think about what makes sense. You show maturity by asking and yes, your parents are right. Your first boyfriend should always be someone your own age who is going through the same things in life. I promise you that your parents care A LOT, they don't want you to have terrible experiences. You're 13, enjoy these years! I'm sure you're a nice young girl and believe me, he's not the last guy on this planet. Wait some time, have fun with your friends and be a kid. It's proven by science that before the age of seventeen or so, you're not fully mentally or physically ready for a "serious relationship." It's nothing against you, this applies to everyone-it's how our brains work. Don't let anyone pressure you into anything. Keep yourself safe and question everything. Find someone your own age and please remember that you are special and deserve to be treated with nothing but respect.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue +, writes (10 September 2016):
 You cant help feel what you feel honey but there is a fair amount of emotional and sexual maturity in what seems 'only' 3 years. At 16 he needs to show intellectual maturity by not pursuing you. It sucks and most defiantly hurts not to be able to be with someone you like so much. Try not be angry with your parents , they are not being mean, because it is their job to love and protect you. Not approving or giving you permission is good parenting.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (10 September 2016):
 Yes it's wrong. Of course when you're 13 and think you're in love, you won't listen to what anyone says because you think the world is only for you. We as strangers on the internet can only tell you that this is unacceptable and you should never get involved with a 16 year old at your age. The rest depends on you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2016): Sorry sweetie but your parents are right he is way too old for you. Please break up with him and stick to boys your own age.
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A
female
reader, Andie's Thoughts  +, writes (10 September 2016):
 A 16 year old young man should not see a 13 year old girl as dateable. That's nothing against you, but he should be dating girls his own age because there's a big difference between 13 and 16.
I know you feel love for him (it's not in love; you'll know that when you're older and experience it), but it's inappropriate. I'm sorry, but I think you should break up; as much as you may not feel like one, a 16 year old should see you as a child.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 September 2016): Sorry but he's too old for you, it's nearly pedophilia, he is using you.
Too big an age difference.
You are very young, he's too old for you, if you were 15 it would not matter.
Please stop this, he's doing the wrong thing, you are a child, he's peverted. Stop before he hurts you or you get pregnant, you are a child
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