A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i'm currently engaged to my high school sweetheart of almost 4 years. But this past spring, we took a break and i dated another guy for almost 6 months and was forced to break up with him by my controlling mother. i can't stop thinking about him, and if i could find a way, i would still be with him. i feel dirty and low for treating my fiance this way. i just don't know what to do. should i tell my fiance about my feelings or should i try to forget my ex all together?
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (10 December 2009):
I think this is a sign to stop the engagement. If you try to forget your ex for the sake of your current relationship and future marriage, rather than for get him for your own sake, then you're not going to get over him. You say if you could find a way you'd still be with him. That says to me that this engagement needs to be called off, and you need to end it with your fiancé. People will judge you less harshly for doing it now, the when you've married. What would happen if you married, and you saw that guy? You'd be tempted. You don't love your fiance enough to be able to make this marriage work. The answer, I'm afraid, is to call the engagement off and cut contact with him so he can move on. Don't feel bad for feeling this way. But please let your fiancé move on. In the meantime, you need to focus on your own life and do what you want to do.
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