A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Alright I've been posting around that I like my second cousin and on how beautiful she is.Here's the main story on what happened what I posted before to get a understanding of it:http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-really-love-my-second-cousin-how-can.htmlAlright here's the problem now. I've been doing my own research in my heart and relized that it wasn't crush/forbbiden love. It was family love. The main problem is, I haven't seen her for 3 years / haven't communicate for 2 years. What should I really do? Like I have the confidence but I'm just scared that things might go bad. Should I give her a call or something? If you suggesting me facebook or email. I tried and she never replied back and declined my request. So what should I do now? I wanna tell her that I miss her so much and ask her how's school is coming along and everything in her life. I could careless if she has a boyfriend or anything. I've moved on from this crush/forbidden love and focusing that it was family love.Thanks guys, and girls for helping me and reading this. It really means a lot to me.P.S I hope you people can understand what I wrote.As always, have a beautiful day. ;D
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confidence, cousin, crush, facebook, has a boyfriend, she has a boyfriend Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012): Best wishes. I sometimes find that given enough facts things are easier to decide. Second cousin marriages produce the most children but not necessarily the most grandchildren. That's the biology. Seems mother nature is quite happy with that. Here's an article from SCIENCE, about the most prestigious science journal in the world. It will cost you a few bucks to get a copy online from sciencemag.org.
An Association between Kinship and Fertility of Human Couples Agnar Helgason et al. SCIENCE vol. 329 no. 5864 February 8, 2008 page 813 - 816
Read it carefully, particularly the way they calculate cousins and notice they don't graph second cousins but "second cousins or closer" and so forth. Right now it is the best information on the most important decision you'll ever make. Of course you may not be thinking babies, but if you are falling in love, the issue does come up. I think you'll find the article encouraging. And if you take any criticism from anybody you can be confident they won't have a reference as good.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 January 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI already did the last time I was in San Diego. But I didn't had the chance to see her and I wrote her how things were going. Sometimes I regret sending the letter. I think I put in the letter "I have feelings for you as a family" and telling her all my life stories. But if your wondering if she reply back, she didn't. I attached 2 dollars into the letter so she doesn't have to pay for mail. But no reply back. :( *sigh
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2011): write her a letter tell her how you feel .it does work i did it to my cousin
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionAlright, I'll try my best to call her one day. I'm just too scared. I'm afraid of losing her, I know that age difference is one thing and what we have in our lives. I just want to let her know that I miss her, and I want to see her soon. Like, something just tells me in my heart what I am missing from that family love. Anyway, ill see on what I can do.
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A
male
reader, The Realist +, writes (12 December 2011):
 If you miss her then give her a call sometime during the day when you figure she will most likely be able to talk. I understand how you feel. I hadn't seen a cousin of mine for about 7 years and ending up getting her cell number so I sent her a text saying that I missed her. We ended up talking on the phone catching up for over an hour.
The worst thing that could happen is that you realize that she doesn't want to keep in touch with you but it is better to find that out for yourself.
As you get older you realize that there is more responsibilty for you to keep in touch with family rather then just relying on family gatherings.
Best of luck to you.
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