A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: While I was at work, I noticed that a female has taken a shine to me, I don't know if I read into the wrong or she genuinely liked me. I've not asked her out, but I'm thinking of doing and im not sure what to do for the best. While I was making my self a cup of tea, she unexpectedly came into the room to make herself a drink, asked me my name and gave me her email. And said email me sometime and that she liked me. I'm not sure if anyone has said anything to her about me.What do you think.I'm pondering whether to said an email to her but don't want to make myself a fool.HiWanted to ask you a question about something, and I wont be offended if the answer is no. I like you a lot and have noticed you have taken a shine to me which is cute. We don't get much of a chance to talk at work, so I was thinking maybe we could meet up and get to know each other properly.There's no harm in meeting and I am told I am nice and respectful guy. I know you are skeptical and have doubts. But life's too short and I think we should seize this opportunity while we can.What do you think?Let me know.Should I send this? Sorry if it's long.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (30 June 2016):
You need to be more relaxed about it, hey wanna go for a drink tonight? Hey wanna have lunch tomorrow? Hey how about we go for dinner on Wednesday? Get what I am saying keep it casual and see her response.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 June 2016): As she doesn't know me that well, hence skeptical
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (21 June 2016):
What makes you think that she is skeptical and has doubts? Your email sounds as if this girl has not even looked at you and you are trying to ask her out. Let it be a bit more casual.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2016): That's fine, I'm willing to listen to any advice offered.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (20 June 2016):
I agree with jls022
MODIFY your e-mail to her. I like jls022 version MUCH better than yours (sorry)....
And maybe think LONG and HARD whether you want to even TRY this or not. Because if it doesn't work out... you still have to SEE her every day at work....
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2016): Wanted to ask you a question about something, and I wont be offended if the answer is no. I like you a lot and have noticed you have taken a shine to me. We don't get much of a chance to talk at work, so I was thinking that maybe we could meet up and get to know each other properly.
There's no harm in meeting and I am told I am nice and respectful guy. I know your skeptical and have doubts, but life's too short and I think we should seize this opportunity while we can.
What do you say?
Let me know
Does this sound better?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2016): What second paragraph do you mean janniepeg? is the rest of it okay?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2016): Sorry if I went into a panic frenzy, it's just its never happened to me before and its a new situation for me.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (19 June 2016):
She did everything EXCEPT tear open your shirt and tell you "I want you to be the Father of my children."
WHAT MORE DO YOU NEED TO GET HER "HINT"???????
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, jls022 +, writes (19 June 2016):
I think that message is a bit OTT if I'm honest. I'd change it to say something more like 'Hey, thanks for giving me your email. I thought I'd take this opportunity to ask whether you fancied getting together for a coffee sometime? We don't get much of a chance to talk at work and it would be good to get to know you a bit better. No worries if not.'
The line about it being 'cute' that she's taken a shine to you sounds a bit patronising in my view so I'd definitely remove that, plus the rest of it comes across as if you think she's going to say no. Confidence is key my friend! it's always more appealing when someone is confident enough to take a shot and go for it. Good luck!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2016): If she said she liked you to your face, and said email her sometime: then make sure your emails are not of a personal nature and not sent from your work computer to hers.
If it's her personal email away from work, I'd say your response is fine.
Starting office romances is risky. If things don't work-out, or something said is misunderstood; it could jeopardize your job. Take it out of the workplace, behave professionally when you're on the clock at work. Don't come on too strong, just let her lead the way. Make no advances until you know she is receptive and interested in anything other than being friendly at work, and she's not just a flirt who likes male attention. Make sure you're not misreading her intentions.
Liking you can also be meant in the professional sense.
You met her at work, and that sets automatic boundaries.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (19 June 2016):
If it's long then just erase the second paragraph. It only reassures women who are paranoid in nature but for most of us we don't want to be assumed that we are. Yes there are creeps out there but we don't live in fear that we are going to meet one every day.
I think she is genuine and is being effortlessly interested. Just take it easy. It's just a first meet. All you know is that you had a good impression on her. Whether you want to know each other properly, time will tell.
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