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age
30-35,
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writes: My best friend isn't acting like herself. As long as I've known her she's thought sex is something you should wait a long time before partaking in with your partner, which was a view I completely supported. We talk about these kind of things all the time and suddenly lately ever since some of our close friends started having sex she's started changing.Now she just wants a relationship just so she can not be a virgin anymore. She sees being a virgin as a burden. I lost mine not by my own choice which is a completely different story and it disgusts me that she just wants to throw it away. I can't stop her but I just don't know why she's changed her opinion suddenly.She even stayed with her recent ex even after she realized she didn't like him just so she could try and have sex with him. He wasn't up for that so he said no and they broke up.I'm just really confused. What can I say to her to try and change her opinion?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2010): My friend was a lot like your friend- she was very adamant on being and staying a virgin. Then she met a guy and hung out with a different crowd of friends. Some of them teased her for still being a virgin, so she started to change- she wanted the teasing to stop. She also didn't like being the "odd one out" so to speak. She is now dating a lot of guys, but that's her decision. Once someone puts their mind to something, there is no stopping them. Sadly, this sounds like your friend's case- some people just have to experience things for themselves, regardless of what others around them say.
You're a very caring and protective friend- she's lucky to have you in her life. I also tried to warn my friend, but she just accused me of being jealous. So there is nothing to do except have your shoulder ready for her to cry on when she needs it.
A
female
reader, Over..worried.  +, writes (22 July 2010):
 Just ask her what changed her mind. Don't make her feel like you are trying to change her mind. Just talk to her ... hey hun, why is it that you so badly want it gone? Don't tell her it's wrong. Maybe she is feeling pressured and these other friends want her too.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (21 July 2010):
Well, you're a really good friend. And you've obviously been through a lot as well.
I half wonder if your friend is hell bent on losing your virginity because of what happened to you. People can do a lot of crazy things when something happens to them, or someone close to them. Maybe she's been affected by what happened to you, or maybe to someone else. Her view of sex could have been cheapened, and she might well not view it as importantly as she did before.
I don't think you can say anything that will suddenly change her mind. But I think you could do to sit down with her and tell her that you're worried for her, and ask her to be honest about why she's changed her mind. And if you think it will help, and you can talk about it, explain to her how you feel about what happened to you. See what she says there.
Failing that, be there with the box of tissues to help her when it goes wrong.
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