| A
male
,
*pesh
writes: My girlfriend broke up with me recently because she said we were fighting and arguing too much. We are both teenagers. But after talking things through she said that she want to still see me now and again while meeting other people. I've agreed to this for now, but I don't know if I should continue to agree. I love her very much and I feel I might be able to get her back. But why would she want this and what should I do??? Help! My heart is broken.
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, jo_betty_smith  +, writes (12 April 2006):
 I'd tread very carefully. As difficult as it might be to accept, all the signs point toward her not feeling as strongly about you as you do about her. For instance, would you have ever dreamed of suggesting to her that you should see other people, if you knew full well it would really hurt her? Probably not - because you love her and so wouldn't want to hurt her.
For as long as you continue to see her, your feelings will continue to stay strong and you'll maintain hope that you might be able to get back together and be exclusive. But probably all that will happen is that you'll keep getting your heartbroken time and again, everytime that she goes on a date with some other guy. If you continue to see her and date her, it also gives her the message that you'll put up with anything to be with her - even her seeing other guys - which puts the relationship on bad footing and eventually leads to things going wrong between you.
It may happen that in time she realises that she really wants to be with you, but she'll figure it out for herself and there's nothing you can do to influence her - much as you'll obviously want to. You'll have a much more equal, secure and happy relationship if she has come back to you by herself because she's realised that you're the one she wants, rather than because you've had to plead with her to do so.
My advice on what to do now is to tell her that you can only handle being just friends with her for now, and that she's free to start meeting new people. I would keep in touch with her to leave the way open for her to change her mind in future, but on the whole keep your distance. Keep yourself as busy as you possibly can with friends so you don't have too much time to think about her while you are not together.
I hope this helps!
|
