A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:so my girlfriend and me were making out (going I'm to G rated for you a bit) and other "stuff". I found out she stuffs her bra. She ran out of the room when I say must have somethng imsensitive. Why is she being over sensitive and stuffing her bra when didnt need to?
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female
reader, PsyCookie  +, writes (9 August 2008):
 Women tend to think of their boobs as a "status" for hierarchy. This is an unconcious thinking, but it's very reasonable and easy to figure out. Guys like boobs, specially big ones, so if a girl has big boobs, then she has chaces to get with a guy. Of course, what many of the women don't realize is that every guy is different and will not even care (or notice) their boob size since they only look at their face.
Now, although I know you NEVER meant to hurt her, I understand why she hurt easily. You were getting into a sexual act, so feeling your body as a valuable tool for the other person's satisfaction is an important thing. Because you commented on she stuffing her bra, she might have felt inadequate and "not enough" for you, and her faking her assets might have felt her with shame and embarrassment.
Now, I won't tell you to apologize, but I will tell you to try to confort her and make her feel better about herself. Yes, you have to go and talk to her about this incident. Tell her that you really don't care of her boob size and that she shouldn't try to look "bigger" for you because for you she's the most beautiful girl in the world (Yes, you have to sweet talk her). One of the main reasons she has doen this is because of confidense issues, and you actually praising her will boost up her self-image and she will probably stop doing this.
Now choose your words wisely. Be completely honest with her BUT be tactful. She has to know what you really feel about her and that you want her to be natural.
Now I wish good luck when you talk to her and please don't hesitate. She has to know that she means a lot to you and that her boob size does not matter to you. I hope she understands everything you tell her. And oh, be patient.
PS. (Sorry if you don't understand what I wrote up there. I have Aspergers and I sometimes struggle to explain something and even though I've been taught to express myself in better words I feel this time it will be hard to understand. If you don't understand what I said, just message me and I'll try to explain better)
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2008): The easy answer is that she thinks you fondling her breasts, or seeing them, is more intimate than she is ready to be with you. Please respect that!!
The harder answer is that everywhere you look, TV and movies and music and ads, women are rated by the size and shape of their breasts and told they are only worthwhile if they have big boobs. She is afraid you'll dump her if you know she has small ones.
There was a question on here a couple days ago about "The size of my boobs is worrying me" and it had some good comments.
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A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (9 August 2008):
 girls get self conscious. chances are she likes you a lot and just wants to impress you and she thought making her chest look bigger would work. sad thing is it backfired, so now instead of you liking her more she is probably humiliated and worried you like her less! just reassure her you like her the way she is. over and over if necessary.
it isn't easy living up to media stereotypes.
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