A
male
age
,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend and I both came from relationships where we both were unfaithful. Understanding this we have trust issues. I make every effort to be mindful and respectful of her feelings to insure she is comfortable with my actions. Recently we went out with a large group and she spent most of the evening on the dance floor without me of which became an issue. Am I being overly sensative and jealous or is her dancing inconsiderate?
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female
reader, natasia  +, writes (8 November 2011):
 If you usually dance together, that is bad.
If you don't dance, it is ok she did that.
If you do dance, then yes, to my mind she should have been dragging you up there and spending most of the time if not all the time dancing with you.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (8 November 2011):
 Do you dance?
if not, then no she was not inconsiderate you were at a DANCE club.
IF you dance and she refused to dance with you then yes that's a problem...
I think we need MORE info in this case to help...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2011): Did she actually say that you were not to join her on the dance floor or did you just assume she didn't want you up there?
I would dance whoever I was with, its what dancefloors and music are for.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (8 November 2011):
 It depends. Was she dancing with another guy? Or was she dancing in a group on the dance floor?
I suspect it was the latter. It's perfectly ok to dance with a group on the dancefloor..you could have joined in. She doesn't have to dance with you every song. Nor does she need to ask your permission before touching that dance floor.
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A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 November 2011):
 You went out to a club with a dance floor, -and she danced. What was she supposed to do, to swim ?
Next time you go out, reach her on the dance floor,- or go to the movies.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (8 November 2011):
 There's an old southern adage; "You should dance with the one who brung you". I guess she's just not a very sensitive gal. this should not be a big deal, Now, it had been a party where she went off in the back room with the other guys and did things, then OK, but this day in time folks rarely touch while dancing. Ain't no big deal! Assuming everyone had their clothes on get over it!
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (8 November 2011):
 No it is not inconsiderate, she was out and enjoying herself, if you wanted to go and dance well then you should have went up with her am sure she wouldn't have had a problem with you joining her. Dancing is harmless and plenty of people get great enjoyment out of it. If you wanted to join her then there was nothing stopping you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2011): To take offense is certainly a choice. That you openly admit you are overly sensitive and possibly needy for 100% devotion to the point it may even be unhealthy may be an answer to your question.Did she ask you to dance? Did you ask her to dance? Are you dating someone who enjoys dancing and you dislike it? Then is it fair to cast the judgement that you do? Just because you make the invididual choice and set a standard that 'this is how you love someone' does not mean she shares the same mindset.Even then, instead of being a victim the next time, and sit on your butt, and sulk, how about you get off your butt, and dance with her as much as you can, regardless if its something you like to do or not.Sometimes showing love is doing something as innocent and fun as dancing with the woman you love. Thats something pretty easy to do with HUGE rewards, don't you think?I say forgive her and see you can be proactive the next time you feel 'abandoned' which children of neglectful homes will feel and the TRUE root of the cause to all of your woes.Seeks some counselling as well so you can learn new, effective tools to overcome your abandonment issues that rob you of moments of joy and happiness.Peace Out!
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