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male
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*uckcherry
writes: me and my girlfriend have been dating for over a year now. we haven't had sex yet, and she says its not a big deal. shes says shes ready for it, but everytime the chance comes up she gets mad about something or finds something else to do. how do i stop this, and make her aggressive towards me?
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male
reader, Dr. Reality Check  +, writes (14 November 2006):
 Sounds like she's not ready at all and trying to convince herself that it's 'no big deal', but pulls out at the last minute, as she isnt yet ready. She needs time, but on the other hand she shouldnt be lying to you and leading you on in this way. Talk to her about it, and let her know that if she isnt ready yet thats OK with you, but not to keep misleading you and backing out.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 November 2006): The right time will come but until then please be patient. She might be worried about getting it wrong or displeasing you. If you have waited this length of time then a while longer shouldn't matter.
Take care xx
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A
female
reader, xxxsoulsistaxxx +, writes (14 November 2006):
 Sounds to me like she's not ready yet at all. She's stalling and causing problems between you two to avoid it and this shows me she's nervous and doesn't know how to get over this. I think you need to give her some time, tell her there's no pressure on her to do anything she doesn't want to do and just see how things go.
If you love her enough, you'll wait until she is ready to make this step forward. She may say she's ready because she wants to please you or simply because she thinks she is until it actually comes to doing it, then she gets scared. Just give it time: the more she loves and trusts you, the more confidence she will have and, if it's meant to be, it will happen.
Good luck
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