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anonymous
writes: just before xmas i asked this girl out. she said she doesn't feel the same and she just wants to be friends now. i still love her, i talk to her everyday on msn. could i casually ask her out on valentines day? i just wanna give it another go. any ideas? we dont talk much in school coz she's always surrounded by her mates but online we talk alot. it's her birthday 2days before! any ideas? thanks,
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female
reader, Adelaide +, writes (25 January 2007):
 Hi,
I wouldn't say that this is rejection, I would just say that maybe she is not interested in any relationship currently, she may have other issues in her life at the moment.
If you pluck up the courage to ask her out for her Birthday or Valentines day, why not make it amore casual invite, ask a couple of your friends and ask her to ask a couple of her friends, this way you will get to go out as a group, she will not feel any unwanted pressure. All go bowling or to the cinema. I do hope that you can organise this
play it cool nothing to heavy and who knows?
Good Luck
Kindest Regards
Adelaide
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 January 2007): In my opinion, most of the time when a girl says she just wants to be friends, she means it. By asking her out again she possibly may feel that you are incapable of being just this and shy away from you completely. Is this something that is really bothering you however? I noticed a question similar if not the same as this one posted a few days ago, so if you're the same person (if not sorry) it would seem you're really keen to ask her out. All the same though, If it's bugging you this much, i'd go for it. I mean if you don't ask you never know right? however i'd recommend you ask her in a way that would least likely jeopardise your friendship if that's all she really wants. Maybe acknowledge that you are happy being friends with her but ask if she'd like to reconsider going out with you. Well, actually that sounds kinda crap, but you know, just don't be really forceful or anything. hmm... Hope my advice helps, good luck!
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A
female
reader, ineedinformation  +, writes (25 January 2007):
well .. i hate to say this but chances are if the girl was straight up with you and told you she wasnt interested .. maybe she really isnt. you could try telling her how you feel and just explain to her that you really do like her alot and you'd like to take her out. if she still says no .. back off. because if you keep trying to get her to go out with you, you may end up chasing her away further.
You could always go about it another way and make her see that you really are a cool guy which could eventually make her see that she does want to be with you. i say ask her out on valentines day but say it doesnt have to be a date .. say its just a dinner between friends and mention if she isnt doing anything anyway, why not go out with you? right? and maybe eventually she'll fall for you. good luck and i hope things work out!
-m
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