A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been dating a married women for some time she says she is leaving her husband but when. She tells me she has no feelings for him. She also says that she has told him already and she says she is not leaving him because of me. She say he is very good to her but they have grown apart he is always gone and putting his career first and leaving her with the children. She has a bachelors and has had to put her career on hold cause of him. They were getting a divorce before but he convinced her not to at the last minute after getting an attorney. She has been with him for twelve years. She does not say anything bad about him just that he does not spend time with her boys but get after them when he is around. She admits to me that he is good to her but she just does not love him anymore that she got use to him not being around that when he is here that she does not feel anything for him anymore. She says she is scared to leave him cause she is afraid of loosing the house truck the financials they have build together. Yet she says she is unhappy and wants out. I read alot of other posting and they all said the there husbands were bad people. She says the oppisite i Love her very much and she says she love me will she leave him or not.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (25 February 2010):
No, she won't leave. She has too much to lose and is just using you. Better to move on and find a woman who does love you.
A
female
reader, Lexie88  +, writes (25 February 2010):
 I doubt that she will leave him anytime soon. He gives her security and you're a risk...even if she loves you. She's been with him for 12 years, they have children together and I'm sure their families are connected as well by now.
She might not have feelings for him but he gives her security. Leaving all that behind, and causing so many problems is just too hard to do. Put yourself in her shoes...would you do it? Some would say, yes they would do it for love...but in reality...the security of her marriage, her other relationships with family and her children are far too important to risk.
While she may not love him and they may not be intimate, she's getting that from you. Are you happy being the other man? The man that doesn't get a 100%?
I think that you deserve better. I don't think she'll ever leave him...she has too much to lose. Men usually don't leave their wives and quite often they're more financially secure than a woman...and for a woman to do it is even less likely. Instead they use the other person for the needs that their husband/wife cannot meet. She's having the best of both worlds...are you?
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