A
male
age
30-35,
*heatrelife
writes:My friend and I have admitted to liking eachother a lot. But she has a boyfriend. I had noticed one time a little bit ago that while we were cuddling (we cuddle and rub noses all the time it's just our thing) we had come very close to kissing. Then a couple days later when we were cuddling on my couch and listening to music she kissed me and we did this for about 30 minuits then afterwards we talked about it and I told her I was kind of uncumfotable about it. Then we were at her house doing i-spies. While doing this I noticed a few times when we almost kissed but I tried to avoid it. Then later I couldn't help it anymore and we kissed for about 15 minuits before her sister interupted us. So I told her this time that I really didn't want to do this anymore unless she broke up with her boyfriend. She told me that she isn't happy with her boyfriend and that she wants to break up with him but he threatened with dropping out of school and she doesn't want to hurt him. A couple of days later she came over again and we were cuddling on the couch and she said she wanted to kiss me. I told her no and she became a little upset but accepted it. Then later, she tried again and I couldn't help it but we kissed for a good hour then she said "do you want some nipple?" And I did it. We sucked on eachothers nipples for a while and she asked if I wanted to go farther and asked if she wanted to and she said she could but I said no. Now I really don't know what to do. Her boyfriend is graduating this year and she is a year older than me. I have realized that I can't say no to her because I like her so much. But I don't want to hurt their relationship even if it isn't going so well. They had gone backwards from being boyfriend and girlfriend to just dating before this happend so technically he isn't with her boyfriend but I don't know what to do. Please tell me if I should stop or if it is ok to keep going!
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broke up, has a boyfriend, kissing, nipples, she has a boyfriend Reply to this Question
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male
reader, philipgifts  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 Tell her you dont want to hang out anymore at either yours or her house bc you can't comtrol your emotions for her and you don't feel comfortable doing it with the issue with the bf. Tell her that you guys can hang out at school but as for enything els you'll stop until everything gets resolved.
A
female
reader, elephant159 +, writes (11 May 2009):
 I would say you need to stop. until she breaks up with her boyfriend. Let her know you want to do that kind of stuff but not until she breaks up with her boyfriend. She isn't hurtting him by breaking up with him. She needs to think about herself. She needs to think about what makes her happy. If hes going to drop school because of her then so what. thats his choice. She isn't making him do that. She needs to choose who she watns to be more with. And you need to make sure when you say no to not kissing her you keep it that way until she breaks up with him.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): Well, you see, you CAN say no.
She didn't just magically appear with her nipple in your mouth on day, so don't pretend it "just happened" :)
The next time you say no, mean it. Dont say no and then start cuddling her. You are both guilty here, and someone has to be the adult. Of course it's not ok to "just keep going"... can you imagine what the world would be like if people just kissed whoever they liked because they simply couldn't help it?
Your friend is a cheat and you are helping her hurt her boyfriend. If you have any self respect, stop now!
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A
female
reader, meg2989 +, writes (11 May 2009):
 I think you re doing the right thing while she is well not "with" but "seeing/dating" her boyfriend (or exboyfriend?) anyways what I'm getting at is although it is very hard for you, you need to keep insisting that she break up with him. Its only a month if not less until graduation for him, for your sake I hope she does as she says and breaks up with him after he graduates. Especially if shes not happy with him and they cant work it out. Until then you need to insist on no kissing at least until she has ended the relationship. Good luck honey, many wishes to. I know it will be hard, but hopefully it will be worth the wait. The best wishes to you.
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