A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I have been falling for this girl for a little while now, she is everything a guy could ever want. pretty like drop dead gorgeous funny smartest person I know even if her grades don't reflect it and she has an amazing voice for singing. today I saw her preform and she was amazing I was in aw because I've never heard her sing before and she says she wasn't that good but I wish she could hear what I heard. after her performance I said you did great she smiled at me and said thanks. I wanted to talk to her so much more she was sitting in the seat right in front of me but I couldn't work up the courage I guess to start a conversation. I have had this happen to me several times and then just as now I feel very disappointed I want to be her friend and I want her to like talking to me but it won't happen unless I can talk to her without psyching myself out. she is so perfect to me that I can't speak to her without getting butterflies I guess but all I know is she is the only one who has ever made me feel this way. My question is what do you think this is that im feeling, the disappointment that I have right now for not continuing to talk to her is killing me I feel sick right now but just the few words I said to her at the time made me feel so good. Im not usually that shy when it comes to talking to people but she makes me uncomfortable and it feels good. thats the only way I can describe it. some of my friends say they don't see why she is so special and I am very defensive of her because she really is "3 times a lady" to me. Another question I have is why does she have control over me even if were not dating. She would never ask me for a favor or at least I don't think she would but I honestly would do anything for her. I guess its cause im a nice guy?Final question is when I am a total wimp and don't say anything to her I feel so bad about myself like a loser. I get angry enough at myself that I want to fight and it really bothers me. thanks for the help as an FYI I am 17 and she is 15 almost 16.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you well a bad turn of events, she was the "angle" in my eyes and was a good girl? she had sex with one of my best friends so its over and now she is worried that I will tell everyone. I don't have hate because that doesn't help me or anger or sadness I just know that if word gets out I will be fighting on of my friends and that will be a bad mistake on his part. I talked to her yesterday on IChat til 1 am and then she said she was going to bed. After she told me she hooked up with this guy I selfishly started to believe the other rumors I have heard. "she gets around" well I couldn't sleep last night and my facebook status was Truth is... she liked the status and I wrote on her wall "truth is I was wrong"
5 am she is sleeping and I am sitting in my basement trying to figure out what to do. We were just friends but I don't know what to believe.
This morning I had like 10 texts from her she is really confused and I don't really care. there never was anything and never will be.
A
female
reader, Indie23  +, writes (24 October 2010):
 Your story made me smile, it's just the sweetest thing. You obviously really like this girl and don't feel like a wimp for being afraid to talk to her.
Every time you get nervous about talking to her, just remind yourself that she is a person too. She has a past and she's made mistakes, just like you. Often we are afraid to speak with the people we are crushing on because we build them up so much in our head that they seem unapproachable. I am speaking from experience here, I know what you're going through.
The best thing you can do is just talk to her. All you have to do is ask her how her day is going or what she thinks about a movie or band. It doesn't take much to start a conversation.
It's because you really care for her you would do anything for her. When you care about someone it's just natural to want to help them.
I hope everything works out with you and your '3 times a lady'.
Indie.
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