A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me and my girlfriend have been seeing each other for about 4 months now and she told me the other day that over christmas she got drunk and ended up cheating on me, she didn't have sex with this person but they did other things. I really don't know what to do I still really love her and she still really loves me and wants to be with me and she is genuinely upset with herself for doing it. I've told her i'm willing to forgive her if she promises not to do it again, but she doesn't know if she can and wants to break up with me, so she doesn't cause me anymore pain. I need some advice quick as I am seeing her tomorrow to talk about it.
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cheated on me, christmas, drunk Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2010): I understand she was your first everything- first kiss etc but she was also your first cheater. please do not sound desperate. end it. once you start making excuses for cheaters so early in your life, it means that you are settling for second best.
you are young, play the field. enjoy!
A
male
reader, GrimmReality  +, writes (13 January 2010):
 Please just do yourself a favor and move on. Booze is never an excuse for cheating. It only brings out and puts a microscope of our true selves.
If I were you Id run from her. You are young, dont cast your die with a cheater at such an early stage in your life.
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A
female
reader, tshxs +, writes (12 January 2010):
i agree with "caring guy" if she has said that she doesn't know if she can promise not to do it again then the chances are that she will do it again. theres no point staying in this relationship because you will just end up getting hurt again. good luck
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A
female
reader, Victoria Emily +, writes (12 January 2010):
Sorry but if she can't promise she wont cheat on you again then she obviously dousn't love you that much. She isn't worth it.
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A
female
reader, smile :) +, writes (12 January 2010):
 If you had been with her for over a year I would say there is probably a chance to save the relationship. My boyfriend cheated on me after we'd been together a year. We are working on it to try and ensure he wont do it again. But your girlfriend is saying she doesn't know if she'll do it again or not. If you really want to save it, she has to change (usually cheating involves drink, so maybe she shouldn't get too drunk etc). But if she wont change then she could do it again and you'll only end up heartbroken because you've become even more attatched to her. Don't let her hurt you, you deserve more than that.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy brain keeps telling me that, but I still love her and can't bring myself to break up with her, she was my first kiss and I lost my virginity to her as well, we have been able to trust each other 100% from day 1 and even after she cheated on me she told me everything without me saying anything, I didn't even suspect that she had. I know we've only been seeing each other 4 months, but they've been really special to both of us and I don't want it to end like this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 January 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionMy brain keeps telling me that, but I still love her and can't bring myself to break up with her, she was my first kiss and I lost my virginity to her as well, we have been able to trust each other 100% from day 1 and even after she cheated on me she told me everything without me saying anything, I didn't even suspect that she had. I know we've only been seeing each other 4 months, but they've been really special to both of us and I don't want it to end like this.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (12 January 2010):
Big red flag. She has said that she doesn't know if she can promise not to do it again. That's not good enough. Don't ever be treated like second best. Seriously, you've been going for four months and she has cheated. She isn't worth another moment of your time.
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