A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Morning all.Please advise on the following....Our team leader at work has been promoted to assistant manager and the power has gone slightly to her head. She talks down to us and is quite rude with her comments. For example 1 girl on the team was talking to another colleague about some paperwork- deciding which to prioratise. Our assistant manager overheard the conversation and said " oh for god sake if you are going to complain about it I'll find someone else to do it!" Now my colleague WASN'T complaining so she tried to explain and the assist manager snapped back with " I don't want to hear it!" Now this is just 1 example but everday she will pick or demoralise someone for no reason. This has been going on for a long time.Now 1 of the girls is getting fed up with her bad attitude and suggested that somone should write an anonymous email to our assist managers boss in order for her to stop. The reason she wants it to be anonymous is beacause in the past when another colleague stood up to her she made her working life so miserable- picking on every detail, embaressing her in front of the rest if the team etc.. This colleague then left because of this but never reported her incase she wouldn't get a reference. So if we confront her or report her and she knows it's us she will make it awkward and difficult.Could we get in trouble for setting up an anonymous email address and emailing the big boss?I personally think what she is doing is a form of bullying but I'm not sure how to go about it.Please advise.Thanks
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female
reader, ShiShisAdvice  +, writes (8 January 2011):
 Your boss is unhappy at home, introduce her to a man, she will become softer. Trust me.
A
female
reader, greengirl +, writes (7 January 2011):
 I've been in a similar situation and have to say I agree with the other replies. Always try to talk it through with the person first but if they are unapproachable or uncooperative, then you have no option but to speak to their boss. Be upfront about it, don't send an anonymous letter. If she chooses to target the names who have complained about her, then keep speaking to her boss, telling them that she is now doing this as well.If she has recently been promoted, it may be that she is feeling the stress of the new role and is cracking the whip so you guys deliver the work required - so that she doesn't look bad. She is going about it the wrong way.Suggest this to her boss as it is their job to support a newly promoted member of staff. The most important thing is to remain professional when going about this, state that you enjoy your job but the atmosphere at work is bringing morale down. Good luck.
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A
female
reader, AuntyMaur  +, writes (7 January 2011):
 Lets be grown up here!I suggest you make an appointment with the assistant manager to discuss the issues...take some notes so you are prepared...talk privately about your grievances. The key is to ensure no voices are raised. Sometimes being up front and honest in a calm atmosphere helps everyone without it all getting nasty- no point in making things worse. If that fails then I suggest either seeing the Human resource manager or go see the boss. At Least give her a chance. Communication is the key...perhaps with this strategy the relationships may mend and make for a more open and honest working enviroment.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (7 January 2011):
 I never, ever send anonymous letters, or emails. Being anonymous means that people are not prepared to stand by their words, anonymous letters of complaint are more likely to be thrown in the bin as rubbish than acted upon.
Far more affective for a letter to be written and for you ALL to sign it. It would show that everybody feels the same way and that you all feel strongly enough to put your concerns in writing.
You may need to rewrite the letter several times until it is to everybody's satisfaction, remember to keep it factual and not emotional. If you are able to cite particular instances where people have been bullied, with dates, cite them.
I honestly do hope you decide not to send an anonymous email.
Good luck with dealing with the office bully!
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