A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of 2 years split up with me a couple of weeks ago and it was very very painful.Anyway, we met up yesterday for coffee- for no other reson than to try and clear the air a little so we could both move on (we both live and work in a very small town and we will bump into each other a lot!)My problem is that although my feelings for her are very gradually starting to go, or at least things are starting to hurt less, the sexual desire is not. I just couldn't look at her without wanting to be having sex with her, etc etc!These are difficult feelings to deal with and are generally a lot stronger than when we were together.They are more than just seeing an attractive girl and wanting to go with her, the feelings I have are so much more intense.All I can think about when I masterbate is her as well. And yet its so emotionally painful to do so.How do i get over these feelings? Should I have casual sex with someone else? (I've not wanted to up until now but my feelings of desire towards my ex yesterday were so strong!!) I can't bare to have these feelings so intensely everytime I bump into her, etc.I know I will never ever force myself on her. NEVER. I care far too much about her and would never do that anyway.Are these feelings normal? I've never had them before when I've had a break up.Please someone help me out.
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male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 October 2009):
Yes, they're normal. You were with her for 2 years, and that's quite a lot of time. I'm afraid it will just take you time. Give yourself time to heal and you'll move on.
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