A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:whats everyones thoughts on having sex before relationship? yes or ney? is it lust or love? does a girl who wants sex before relationship love that person? inputs? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, kirra07  +, writes (28 December 2011):
I guess it depends on what you want from that person. If you just want sex/one night stand, have fun. If you want a relationship, my opinion is that it's more meaningful to wait a little bit. Not only does it make both of you more comfortable with each other, you can look back and know that you put getting to know the person before getting in each other's pants.
Now, I met my husband online initially just for sex. We found a connection outside of sex, and began to get to know each other. Then we started dating, etc etc. Now we are married. So a relationship can grow even if you have sex first. But I wouldn't recommend it for the most part. I'd say that girls in general like more of a commitment/relationship before having sex. And sex before getting to know someone is definitely lust, not love.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2011): For me sex ...before... during and after suits me fine, sex goes hand in hand with all the facets of a good relationship I think.
spunky monkey
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2011):
Sex before marriage is one thing. However, I recommend not having sex without a meaningful relationship. Most men really have an issue if they find out their wives did a lot of that. I know I do. If you just give it away to anyone then what's special about it?
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (27 December 2011):
 If a girl puts out for you too soon after meeting you, then YOU have met the most-Divine type of woman.... Congratulations!!!!!
IF you want things to become a "relationship"... then you have all the necessary components (i.e.: a woman who shows up!)....
IF you wish to keep things at arm's length.... whilest still getting a little... then you have that option, too.
Many/most of us men would envy you..... and would cheerfully sell our soul to trade places with you....
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 December 2011):
 define relationship... i have a relationship with my mailman but i don't sleep with him....
if you mean do you not have sex before you make a commitment... I don't know that I agree with that. I don't think that younger women should go around jumping into bed with every guy they like... but I can't see holding out for marriage either.... big help I know.
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A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (27 December 2011):
 Sexual chemistry can lead to a solid relationship because that is part of the ever so complicated idea of attraction. Physical attraction can lead to mental attraction and vice versa.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (27 December 2011):
 I'd predict a poor relationship to evolve from a sex before relationship. It would never be a relationship developed over common thoughts and life goals. It would just be based on physical gratifications.
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A
male
reader, LovelessAct1 +, writes (27 December 2011):
Its a "nay" for me personally. I need to develop a relationship before considering sex. It hasn't always been that way and I've had a few one-night stands, but having experienced that, I've realized it definitely isn't for me.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2011): The best way round is to build a bit of a relationship first. Even if the period beforehand is brief but intense, better that than sex straight off (how would you know if you are in tune as a couple and a relationship desireable). Relationships build solely on sex are a bit doomed in the long term.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2011): I'd never do this. For me, there would have to be some sort of commitment first. Everyone has different values though. I'd be inclined to say that someone who wants sex before being in a relationship is more in lust than in love, but maybe it depends on how long you've known each other. Like if you've been dating for ages without making anything official, perhaps love *has* had time to grow - and the sexual tension has become too much to bear! I can't be sure though. In my opinion it's better to wait, but that's just me. Hope this was useful :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2011): Really shouldn't ahve sex before a relationship in my opinion. It can be lust, depending on the situation. Sometimes a girl who wants sex before a relationship can love that person and somehow thinks that the sex will lead to it, though from what I have seen the guy usually doesn't want to get into a relationship with her if he has already slept with her before getting into a relationship.
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