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*ohican59
writes:i have been seperated for three years and deep in side i have always believed that my wife and i would reconcile to the point we went to church and counseling. it now appears grimmer than it ever has ,, someone said to me or i read some where that i need to grieve. in order to move forward. i am having a hard time doing this. please help Reply to this Question
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reader, mohican59 +, writes (23 September 2011):
mohican59 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthese ansers are great. i do however need some advise as to how people get to the grieving part. im on the fence.
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reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (23 September 2011):
 You need to grieve only for as long as YOU feel that you must.....
After YOUR appropriate time period of grieving, put the matter behind you and get on with your life....
P.S. Are you and the missus divorced? If not, then taking that step would give you a tangible event to tie to the conclusion of your grieving....
Good luck...
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reader, cian  +, writes (23 September 2011):
 It's hard to let something go, especially when you have long-term past. It took me almost two years to realize that I had to let go and get on with my life, after being in a very similar situation. While the process does take time, and perhaps more than you are willing to invest in it, I would say... if it seems like it is over,... (and it sounds as if it is), move on. Get back to enjoying life.
I sought counseling, my doctor (and went on an anxiety med for a period), got back on the horse, and made each day a little better as time went forward.
While I don't think pushing pills is the answer, I would emphasize that taking the time to work thru it... all of it, is necessary. Take the first step... let go.
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