A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:im running out of patience with my boyfriend of 2 years. we are on holidays so i have been at his house for a week straight. While i was there i felt like all he wanted to do was play computer games and was bored with me so i said this to him that i felt like he was pulling away and maybe he needed some time alone so i would go home and be with my family (we live an hour and a half away) he agreed and said if i feel like he is pulling away that i should let him know and spend some time at home.so i came home yesterday and he is angry at me for leaving. whenever i speak to him he doesnt even want to talk, saying he is angry because i dont even want to be with him at his house. He expects me to spend my whole holidays there (a month straight) and doesnt want me to go out with my friends at all. will this ever change?
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female
reader, MissKin  +, writes (9 July 2009):
 Hm well, if he won't come to yours for whatever reason then you really do hve to talk to him and make him see that you need to be at home as well. There's giving him space, but then there's leaving him as well. sometimes we just need a break for an hour or two a day. So why don't you take things to do with you? Take a book you want to read or a notepad and pens and pencils so you can write or draw, or a game of your own? Perhaps you should both invest ina game you could play together? Or if you have a portable gaming device (there's too many to choose from heh.) you could take that with you and have times when you're together, and both doing your own little thing while still getting the satisfaction of being together.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 July 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyes we have been together for weeks straight before, but whenever it was like he was pulling away i would stay and not give him space, until i read a book on relationships that stressed the importance of space.
earlier in our relationship he had a falling out with my mum (because he wasnt treating me right) thats why he cant come to mine anymore, which is hard on me because if i want to be with him i have to go there, he wont come here anymore.
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A
female
reader, MissKin +, writes (9 July 2009):
You've been together 2 years, have you ever spent so much time together before? People can't smother each other for weeks on end 24 hours a day. You have different hobbies and you both want each others attention while being able to do what you wish to do.
I think you need to balance it out. Let him know that you DO want to be with him, but you also need to spend time with your friends and familiy and so does he! Make sure he understands that you're not at home to hurt him, you're there because you love your family and you love him.
Why don't you invite him to yours as well as you being at his? That would help to balance it out too! So that he knows what it's like to be away from home for so long without having any of your own things to do. Just talk about it. He'll come around and if he doesn't then he's being immature about it all and needs to stop being upset and see that you really aren't trying to upset him and that he can see you as much as he wants, but you should both appreciate the time you spend together and pay attention to one another.
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