A
female
age
51-59,
*ajma
writes:my question is regarding wearing below navel low on hips. i am a housewife live in karachi. i wear sarees or salwar kameez suits. at house i avoid any under garments. i feel comfortable wearing any bottom below navel low on hips and at home without under garment. i am hurt when my elderly family member/relative rebuk me and say i should not expose bare hips and navel when wearing saree. for salwar kameez suits they want me to wear bra even at home and say my salwar should not be extremely low on hips. They say me shameless because my kameez is revealing my body parts. i have got used to wear revealing hips etc since my college days. how can i change myself? my husband has no problem regardng my wearing style. just wanted ur valuable n frank comments on this matter.Najma
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female
reader, Shaista amir +, writes (27 September 2012):
Iam a 20 yr old married women but wearing undergarments is no problem for me they support and coomfort me and i even wear them to bed
A
female
reader, Najma +, writes (19 September 2010):
Najma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI will do because I am also grown up in a culture to be a good host and make guests comfortable and cater to their needs.
Our culture also for guest is to greet hosts and not to hurt them. Why elderly guests can't tolerate their host as they feel comfortable?
I don't wear bra and panty at house, wear saree or salwar low on my hips for my comfort and ease not with the aim of revealing. When ever a guest comes I particulary take care and keep cover with pallu of saree or cover dupatta when in salwar kameez. People around are mostly unmannered they can't stop gazzing my navel, my hip curves. I never mind they gaze at my breast or they gaze into the depression between my stomach and thighs and probably they know I am unshaved or shaved. When I am in salwar kameez they gaze through slits of kameez and wait for accidently uplift of kameez. I never mind because I wear with confidence and never had any problem.
Although very difficult but now onwards I will change when ever any elder guest is there particularly who had been poked on me. Hope for better atleast I can get their blessings.
Najma
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A
female
reader, Najma +, writes (19 September 2010):
Najma is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Ask oldersister, johnnyrockets and followtheblackrabbit.
All three advises are same and I hope it will work. I will do it. Thanks again.
Najma
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A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (18 September 2010):
 Your body, your house...your comfort! If your husband is ok with it it's no big deal. It's not like you're walking around naked :p But, since your relatives are of a different mind, just to keep the peace, come to a compromise. They are elderly right? So their minds are very hard to change. So if its summer and hot around the house, ask the older female relatives what they do to avoid heat, if they dressed differently etc. That way you're showing respect and interest in their lives and you won't be giving in to them overtly. Orjust avoid dressing that way when they're around. I love walking around in my home in short clothes and my relatives saw me once and rebuked me too. But, I explained that it was just at home and I meant no disrespect so they calmed down and gave me tips as to how to feel comfortable and not "showy." I still walk around as I please but once I know they're coming, I change! Once they're gone, back to comfort :)
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