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Pregnant with body issues!

Tagged as: Health, Pregnancy, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (6 December 2007) 3 Answers - (Newest, 7 December 2007)
A female United Kingdom age 41-50, *igerlilygrrrr writes:

Hi everyone

i am 18 weeks pregnant with twins. these will be my first. I already have quite a big bump, although I haven't changed from the back. I just feel so unattractive, and so worried that I'll never be the same again after they're born (and I wasn't exactly kate moss to begin with - a size 12).

I am really ahppy to be pregnant but this is getting me down. I'm worried my boyfriend doesn't find me as attractive anymore, we only have sex 2 or 3 times a week now.

please help

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A female reader, missmel34 Australia +, writes (7 December 2007):

missmel34 agony auntVitamin E cream, and lots of it. You can buy specific stretch mark cream as well. After your shower rub it into your tummy, breasts and backside.

I'd like to say that you will get back your figure...and you probably will. But I was ravaged by stretch marks from all of my pregnancy's. I have a little bit of loose skin now. Its not that bad, and with alot of exercise its not that noticable when I'm clothed.

Lots of massage and moisturiser.

One more thing, don't forget to prepare your nipples. You can buy specific nipple cream that helps them. Breastfeeding is tricky, the more you can give your nipples a head start the better.

I say all this because I learnt the hard way.

Good Luck...and congratulations.

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (6 December 2007):

birdynumnums agony auntDouble Congratulations! We all feel the same way when it's our first pregnancy. My second was a very big baby, the doctor said the equivalent of a twin birth, and you'll be happy to know that I did get my figure back (I'd happily trade my post-pregnancy body for my 52 year old menopausal body; finally had to admit to giving up the old bikini this year... Ooooh, scary). Pregnancy was a definate body-image crisis, the change can be very hard to watch when we are comparing ourselves to what we have always looked like. We are always the hardest and most critical about our own bodies, but I can assure you that when you are my age and look back at your photos, you will see that it you were gorgeous and probably being a bit hard on yourself. We should all be guys, they always think they look like Brad Pitt! On the other hand, looking BACK at this experience, it was such a brief moment in time, nine months, and I always wished that I could go through birth again - it is the single most exhilarating miracle that I have ever been through! You have so much to look forward to! The maternal intinct, the love that you feel for your babies is the most overwhelming thing! If you and you husband are having sex 2-3 times a week, he obviously finds your new body sexy and that's probably a pretty normal amount for a young couple in your situation. It might change after, but make sure that you schedule it in, a good sex life is vital to a good relationship. After my first pregnancy, I waited 2 months, but after the second - two weeks. Yay - Hormones! You'll know when you feel ready. Best of Luck Dear. Let us know the news - if you do a follow-up it will flag all the Aunties that have written you!

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A female reader, deejuliet United States +, writes (6 December 2007):

deejuliet agony auntOur bodies all change when we have children. This is a fact of life. You boyfriend will look at you a bit differantly now, but believe me, he will still find you attractive, and if he doesnt he has really got something wrong with him and it is better to find that out sooner than later. Many men find that the woman carrying their child is more attractive than ever. Revel in this special time in your life! You are not fat, you are pregnant! And there is no greater miracle. Enjoy your changing body and the sex life you can currently have. Once the babies are born you will be too tired to even think about sex for a long time! ;-'

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