A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 14 years old.I was recently put into the care system but i have just found out im pregnant. I want to keep the baby but i have no support from my family or anyone else to be hounest.the father isnt in the picture either.i also have no where to live, as the placement i am in cant keep me while im pregnant.has anyone got any advice at all. anything would be useful Reply to this Question
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female
reader, LaydeeOfSorrows  +, writes (7 November 2008):
 I can't even imagine what you're going through.I wish I had some useful advice for you, but unfortunatly I have no idea what to say.You are very brave, and I pray that you will get through this.Good luck.xx
A
female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (6 November 2008):
 I strongly urge you to look into adoption. Once there is a baby in the picture then that is the only person whose needs count in my opinion. And what that baby needs is an adult, two parent home with financially responsible parents who can take care of him or her. I do not mean to impune that you are unfit or unworthy of raising a child. But, sweetie, you are still a child yourself. You need to grow up, get an education, and be able to financially and physically take care of a baby before you have one. Right now you are still dependent on others. You cannot work and support even yourself, let alone this child. You will be on welfare and by keeping this child you doom yourself and him to a lifetime of poverty. Do the responsible, loving thing and give it up for adoption. As one aunt suggested, you could do an open adoption so that you could still be a part of the babies life if that is what would make it easier for you. But please, put this baby first rather than yourself. Good luck, sweetie!
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all the advice. its very useful and things are beging to seem alot clearer i have told my local authority and they need to asses me further on in the pregnancy to see if i am capable to keep the baby.
again thank you all
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2008): You should always consider all of your options. If you don't believe in abortions then maybe you should look into adoption. If you have no support or anyone to help you emotionally and more importantly, financially, then adoption would be the best thing to do. I know that depending on where you live and what adoption agency you go through, there is a thing called Open-Adoption. An open adoption is where a family decides to take in your baby and as the child grows, they allow a certain amount of contact so the child still knows who his/her parents are. It could be actual face-to-face meetings or them sending you pictures and/or videos.
Hope that little bit of information helps you and good luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2008): HAVE the baby. If the worst comes to the worst you may end up putting the baby up for ADOPTION. Still, this is a much better option than taking a life.
Take care X
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A
male
reader, milker +, writes (24 October 2008):
I would suggest sincerely that you DON'T have the baby. However much you feel that you want to keep it and love it, you are much to young to muck up your life at such a young age.I am a male quite a bit older than you and there are lots of things to do in your life before you have babies. I have two children of my own. We had these when we were 24 and 21 years old.Ask to have a talk with a person that you can trust who is also a lot older than you so has a lot more life experience. It is lovely to have children but you are too young and there are so many things to see and do before going into this.Start opening your eyes to the world around you. Go to school to continue your education which is so important. To know how to read, spell, add up, learn about the world ,read lots of books relating to normal things. Aim for something big in your life like visiting other countries in years to come but in the immediate future to get a job that you would like. Put your whole heart and soul into learning hard to get a good interesting job later.Don't write your prospects off too early by having this baby.Don't live a life of having sex with loads of people. You may not have done anyway but keep yourself for special people that are interested in you for things other than just sex. You have learnt the hard way how the father walked away. Make sure that you ALWAYS use protection for your own safety and even just for the fact that you could get pregnant. All the best for what you would REALLY like for your life. You only get one chance to do the best for yourself in this world.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (24 October 2008):
Well you need to get on to your care worker and they will have to find you some where new to live.
Do you want to raise it alone in care? Or would you consider letting someone adopt it so you can get on with your life and make a future for yourself?
Talk about all the options with your social worker and they will help you.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, Confused_123 +, writes (24 October 2008):
Well as you said any advice would be useful I'll give you my pretty limited advice as I too am only 14.
Have you told your care worker or anyone for that matter? If not, tell someone who you trust. See what they have to say I'm sure they'll be understanding and will be able to offer you some proper advice on what you do now.
Hope this helped at least a little. good luck.
=]
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A
female
reader, tammye17 +, writes (24 October 2008):
 hi, all that i could tell you is that u are a verry brave girl for wanting to keep the baby, i admire u for that. my advice is that you put yourself toguether and confront the situation. if u have no support from anyone then i suggest you tell whever is in charge of where u live. i dont know how things work over there, find out if you will be allowed to keep the babu because of your young age. be good to the baby, pull yourself toguether, give that baby the life he/she deserves. good luck
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A
male
reader, Boredatwork +, writes (24 October 2008):
 I suggest finding your local Brook center and going to speak to them, they deal with more than just abortions, and can help put you in touch with all thr rigth people, to hopfully set yor mind at ease.
Do you gave a social worker you can talk to? this is also an option, they have your best interests at heart also!
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