A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i found out my boyfriend had been seeing another women,although it was her who told me and not him. we've been together for nearly 4 years and i was 7 months pregnant when i found out. it had been going on for almost a year and i had no idea. he has since proposed and swore never to do it againg,saying he wants us to be a family. do i stay with him and see how things go or get rid? my hormones are all over at the minute and i have no idea what i should do. i do want us to be a family but is that too easy for him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, YummyMummy +, writes (1 November 2007):
 I would let things settle. Let him be apart of your pregnancy still and be a dad, but don't make any life changing choices whilst your hormones are on the go. I am currently 9 months pregnant and I check every choice I make with my partner, even really simple ones like food shopping because my hormones are so bad.
Once your hormones have settled see how you feel then. Can you forgive and forget and move on from what he has done? The biggest thing is trusting him again, and believing him when he says its over and he wont do it again. You dont want those niggling away at you and then when you fall out to throw it all in his face.
It may take a long time, and he will have a lot to make up but don't cut him out of your life just yet until you can think with a level, non pregnant head.
taking him back doesn't make it easy for him. He has a lot of work to do to make it up to you. You both need to work through this together, or it wont heal. You need to gain trust in him again and forgive him, and he needs to work on helping you achieve that. And you both need to be the great parents you were going to be before this whether this works or not :)
Good luck and if you want a pregnant ear to listen at any time drop me a line :)
I'll understand the crazy pregnant things :)
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
A
female
reader, Mistify  +, writes (1 November 2007):
 It is understandable that you would be upset about this. It is very inconsiderate of him to treat you this way - especially now that you need his love and support. Partners often stray. Just look at other questions and answers on this site. I never even realized that it happens so often until i came on here. Anyway - when your man / woman cheats, something is wrong in your relationship and that is what you need to find out. You have two choices - either you move on, and become a single mom (which is by no means easy - but more than possible to make a success of) or you stay, FORGIVE him, and go on with your life.
It is never worthwhile to stay with somebody you don't love just because of a baby. I didn't, and today i'm very successful in my career, have a wonderful daughter and a loving and caring partner. However, if you love him, it is always worth it to try and make it work. I would suggest you sit down with him, lay out the rules of your relationship, and hear him out. Any relationship takes work, and if you are doing all the work, then you need to speak to him about doing more.
Good luck.
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