A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ive been seeing this guy for 2 weeks then we finally ended up getting together he then asked if we could have a baby together so we agreed and decided he would move in with me. after a month i keep getting people saying his past to me and so i questioned him about it, he then got really stressed with it and started texting me saying its over!!anyway after 2 days we were back together and i started getting texts from his brother saying that im wasting my time and he will dump me again wen he feels like it and within 3 days he had dumped me over a text again, anyway why we were seperated his brother was texting me saying that he'll b there for me and that we met up and spoke about my him and how he's done it to all his exs,and again i took him back coz i believed we could work it out and that he was truly sorry, and then over something so small and he dumped me again 3 times in 5 weeks so that was it for me I've left him but now he's begging me back and seems like he has realised what has been going on and my head is saying try him 1 last time n now ive got his brother calling me and texting me asking to meet up but i still love my ex what shall i do????
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007): I think you should continue to give him chances until you finally have had enough and learn to stop going back to this guy. This way may be something that others would not have suggested you to do, but this way will allow you to keep getting 'punched' until you learn to defend and stand up for yourself. In this case, learn to stand up for your own dignity and self-worth.
A
male
reader, Richard_EMids +, writes (1 November 2007):
 Hi - Well you are where you are at the moment. Break-ups and make-ups was what it was all about when I was your age. At that time I couldn't understand my feelings very well - breaking up would be a test on myself - and on my girlfriend - it was an odd way of finding out what she really felt for me. If you've had enough of the "on-off" and he hasn't then it's going to be problem. But best thing to do is tell him - tell him how you really feel - tell him you can't handle the on-off aspect anymore - and that you are willing to put up with it for no more than (1/2/3..) times. One of them will be last one - you won't turn back.
Looking ahead - if this relationship doesn't work out it is probably better to spend longer getting to know each other before moving in togther, otherwise you will be dealing with this situation again. Many people feel a minimum period of six months is required before you really know someone - and if you are planning to have babies and take on financial commitments a steady year or more would be better. Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2007): What a ride! Get him and his brother out of your life now. Also, please consider whether it is a positive thing to have a baby with someone you don't really know. You will end up a single parent and the guy will never be responsible enough to pay child support let alone lend any other support. It's a difficult life being a single mother so please don't take a decision like this so lightly. Good luck!
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (1 November 2007):
 This is not a relationship...it is a revolving door for him to come walking back into your life as and when he feels like it. A few weeks is never enough time to decide to have a baby with someone and he has demonstrated how immature he is already surely? Hardly Dad of the Year material. By always taking him back on his whim you are in real danger of becoming a doormat to be walked on...surely you think more of yourself than to allow any man to behave this way!
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A
female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (1 November 2007):
 Give him another chance?. Are you mad love.
Look you let the guy move in with you far to quickly, and he has turned out to be a rat. In my opinion the brother is not much better, sniffing around because you have been dumped. I would not bother with either of them. But its up to you.
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