A
female
age
30-35,
*tupidcupid23
writes: So I've been dating my boyfriend for over year now and we haven't had any issues in the past. But, recently I had cheated on him, for what seems to be no reason at all, in a threesome. The other girl in the threesome is my best friend and her then boyfriend, and my boyfriend found out about it a few days later. Obviously, he was upset about it, but we decided to try to make things work. One of the conditions was that I couldn't see my friend anymore. Well, it's been almost half a year later since the incident and I still miss my friend. We work together so I'll see her then but other than that I can't talk to her or see her in any way. Understandable. However I don't know what to do. I still want to be best friends with her but is my boyfriend is an OK with it then I don't know how to go about this whole issue. I love my boyfriend but I also love my friend. do you think that there is any possibility that he would learn to except what happened and forgive me and her? Or is it a lost shot and I just need to learn to let it go and lose my friend? Since I don't want to break up with my boyfriend, I just want to hear a few opinions from others. Thanks for the help!
View related questions:
best friend, threesome Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (10 February 2016):
 This is what happens when we cheat. I am sorry that you miss your friend, but am sure it has been hard on him accepting that you cheated on him. His way of dealing with this was if you promised to end the friendship, I guess he needed to know that you where sorry.
The only thing you can do is talk to him and tell him how you feel and see how it goes from there, if he still insists that you cannot be friends then I agree with
Ivyblue and dean 93 its the least you can expect. Be thankful he forgave you.
A
female
reader, dean93  +, writes (9 February 2016):
I don't think it's possible to stay friends with her if you still want to be with your Boyfriend. That was the condition he imposed to make things work. I agree with Ivyblue that it's pretty black and white. If the roles were reversed, I don't think you'll want him still being in contact with someone he cheated on you with, regardless of gender and it is simply out of respect. It is an uncomfortable thought to have I feel. Maybe after a loooooong time, it will heal all wounds, but for now, I think it is highly unlikely he will want you to remain friends with her.
...............................
A
female
reader, Ivyblue  +, writes (9 February 2016):
 I assume he knows that you two work together so it is inevitable that there will be times to catch up? That you don't really have a lot of control over. To be honest, regardless that she is a woman, she is the very person, in addition to yourself, that deceived and made a fool of him. So I guess while she is there, so is the threat or temptation of it happening again. You chose to cheat and as a consequence you chose to accept the terms of remaining in the relationship with your bf. Honestly I think you are fortunate to be able to remain friends at work because most people just would go as far as even tolerating that. I think it is pretty much black and white. Like it or lump it kind of thing. But thats me! All the best.
...............................
|
