A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am 27 I was in a relationship with my daughters father for 4years...we had a roller coaster type of relationship. he is very jealous and treated me like I was wrong for having had sex before him... basically all of our arguments consisted of what I had done in my past with who how many... I left got pregnant and noe we have a 11month old daughter... I love him to death... he has asked me for a very long time to come home because he was lonely without me... but my fear of being put down a persecuted won't let me in a nutshell he found someone else.... he insists that if I come home he will be done with her... he says he doesn't want to be alone and so he would leve her if I return... my self esteem is low I question evrything I do I feel like a whore... but I know that I desere love and respect... he never listens to me at all and feels that I have caused him all this pain... I've never cheated but he has... he has messed with this girl and me... but we weren't together so I do not hold this against him...however, I can't seem to leave him alone this love it makes me weak I love him so much but nothing ever changes... how can I get over him I've tried everything? he still says he loves me everyday... I can I stop having communication when we have a child together? I just don't know what to do... he has no idea how bad he has hurt me because he will not listen he says all men are liars and cheats...please some one help me I'm desperate to get over this guy... I also donet want my daughter around other fémales and ndnt don't know how to handle it!... he says he won't but its obvious there's no trust or respect...
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jealous, liar, self esteem Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Arcada  +, writes (31 May 2008):
Come on love, pull yourself together!
Just from reading your post, I can tell that you are an intelligent girl that deserves better!
You have nothing to worry about, he has the problem, not you!
The fact that you are writing on here, shows that you have the desire and balls to wanna help your relationship!
Be cool, put yourself in your own shoes, keep your head up high and if you ever wanna chat, please contact me.
xxxxxxxxxxxx
A
female
reader, Artistry +, writes (31 May 2008):
 Hi there, You have the answer within your question. You may love him, but he does not respect you as he should. He controls through intimidation, and ridicule, he does not have high self esteem in my opinion, and he wants you to have less. This is not love, this is a form of abuse to keep someone in his grips. Your daughter should know her father and they should see each other, but this individualis going to make you depressed, you will never do enough to make him happy and you are going to almost, go out of your mind trying to please him. Tell me if you would, what does he do, to make you feel special? Think about putting yourself first,you deserve better. You should try to be involved in a healthy relationship, this one will make you sick, now maybe I am wrong, you have been with him off and on for years, were you happy? You were enduring, this is not good. You are strong enough to decide for yourself, what you want out of life. You may want to go back with him out of habit, don't sell yourself short. Love yourself, you should not be ridiculed for any reason. You will need mental help. if you return to this man, in my humble opinion. Take care of yourself. You are strong, sometimes love is just not enough, as the saying goes.
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