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female
,
anonymous
writes: i have a problem, im way to big of a flirt.....and im afraid its makeing my bf jelous! when ever i talk to any guy, i tend to flirt...not on purpous....i just do, and my friends notis it all the time, but i really dont.....though, i am starting to.i love my bf soo much! and i dont want my flirting to get in the way of that! i mean i flirt with my bf like way more then anyother guy! i geuss my bf really never flirts back though....please help!is there a way to get my bf to flirt with me more?am i flirting because my bf wont flirt with me?am i flrting because i dont love my bf (as much as i think i do!?)am i flirting becasue i just do, and its not really under my controll?i really need opinions!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (31 May 2006):
 Ask yourself the question, if your fella flirted with women the way you do with men, would this be ok.
We flirt with people to attract there attention, when they flirt back it makes us feel good, it also tells us the other person is interested in us sexually and flirting thus is part of a mating ritual that all animals take part in.
Your fella is in a relationship with you so feels he has done the flirting part and won the prize so why flirt anymore.
Flirting is fun but it can lead to jealousy and pain and sometimes onto something we dont want, so be careful.
A
female
reader, Hopeful +, writes (31 May 2006):
 It's hard to say exactly why you do it - some people flirt more naturally, some don't realise they do it, some do it for innocent attention, some do it because they want someone...so in short, hard to know exactly why you do it.
I use this as the golden rule when it comes to flirting.
Before you say something, just pause and think "Would I say that in front of my boyfriend" and if the answer is no, then perhaps best not to say it to avoid him finding out and getting jealous.
It is natural to flirt but if your partner is getting jealous, its time to reel it in a little bit. You can still have a fun conversation with a member of the opposite sex but it might be worth toning down some of the comments or the langauge you use or the way you say it etc.
Also the other thing to think is "would I be comfortable if he said to another girl what I just said to this guy?" and again if the answer is no, tone it down.
Flirting is huge fun but not worth destroying a relationship with someone you care about over.
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