A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:So, I've come to the point that I just have to ask other people for opinion. I just don't know what to do anymore. I have been dating this guy for about 8-9 months. I mean, we met in october last year and since then we've been texting each other, IM-ing like for 3 hours a day, every single day. We've been going out, and every friday, or even two times a week, we go out to the same bar, and spend about an hour alone outside. Always. He's very attractive guy, but somehow he's not one of those who like to date a lot of girls (he's not gay 100% :D ), or even to stay in touch with many different girls. He comments a lot on my FB profile. Appears on the places that i visit. Sometimes, I send a wall message on FB to someone: "I'll be there and there at that time" to see is he gonna appear, and 2 out of three times, he came.But sometimes, he can just come very angry and doesn't behave very nice to me like ignoring me and than just to make him jealous I send a wall post or something to some of his friends because I know he'll see it. And he always reacts. I do that a lot, acctually. I'm just in good relations with his friends. and I admit that I use that.But now I don't know why he doesn't ask me to be his girlfriend. I mean, everybody asks us: "why aren't you two in a relationship". he also asked me: when people ask you what am I to you, what do you say, I didn't know what to respond.We haven't even kissed yet.often i have a feeling that he's just making some excuses to see me, but just goes in a circle, like i should ask him or something. I like him a lot, really, but this undefined situation is driving me crazy. He's 22, so not a child or so.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYeah, I'm aware of the fact that FBing his friends might be a bad idea, but it's like I'm afraid that he might see that I like him a lot, and then I do that.
I've noticed that he's very jelous. Not just 'cause of those wall posts, but also when we are together if I talk to other guys etc.
Also, a week ago his best friend died. I thought that will be bad for us because he doesn't like to speak about his feelings, and that people see him as weak, but it didn't happen.
It's like he felt better when he's with me. That night we went out and mostly didn't say anything, just sit there together and be quiet but I think that's what he needed at that point.
Idk, everything is confusing.
Anyway, thanks everyone :))
A
female
reader, Maisy123  +, writes (15 June 2010):
It sounds like he does like you but is maybe to scared or waiting for you to make the first move. He's getting jealous of you FBing his friends so is interested in you. stop FBing his friends and go out together, lean in to kiss him and see what he does? if he kisses you back he likes you! if he doesnt, talk about your situation openley and honestly, good luck x
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A
female
reader, Auntie E  +, writes (15 June 2010):
 First of all STOP FB'ing his friends. That is just plain silly and immature. If you want to be with this guy the behave that way. You are embarrassing him on line so stop it!Stop with the game playing. Trust me 22 is very young especially for a guy. Stop with the games --that is why you have an "undefined situation.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2010): There are two possibilities here. One, he is gay and he likes to "hang out" with girls. The other is that he is indeed a child and does not have the maturity to commit to a relationship. A friend of mine had a similar experience with a guy. They went ut for 3 years in a very similar manner to yourself. In the end it turned out he just wanted her for money and also turned out to be gay.
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