A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well im a 14 year old girl and i havent started my period yet. but i like this guy and we have been going out for sometime but he wants to finger me and i want him to but can i be fingered without starting? x
View related questions:
period Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, celtic_tiger +, writes (30 May 2009):
 Dear Poster
I am sorry to throw a spanner in the works here, but you are 14 YEARS OLD. It is ILLEGAL for you to have consensual sexual relations under the age of 16. You dont say how old he is, but if he is over 16 this means, if your boyfriend does finger you, he is actually commiting rape and sexual abuse of a minor. It doesnt matter if you say yes, in the eyes of the law, he will be guilty. Equally, if he is also UNDER 16 - he is also a minor, therefor NEITHER of you should be even thinking about doing this.
This includes sexual touching, fingering, oral and full penetrative sex. In fact ANY sexual contact at all.
As you have not started your periods yet, having sexual contact probably isnt a good idea. Your hormones are unlikely to have kicked in fully, and your body has not prepared itself.
Physically, you are still a child. Your body has not matured enough for you to deal with the physical and emotional consequences of this. Your body is telling you that you are just not ready at this moment.
Sex is a wonderful enjoyable thing, but its main aim is for reproduction. Your body has not yet reached the state where it is able to do this. You are still a child in this respect. Once you have started your periods you will feel completely different. Having your periods marks the BEGINNING of the move into womanhood - it does not mean that your should behave or act as an adult. As a woman, having your first period is something you remember for ever, and is a milestone in your life. The feelings that this change brings are not something you can describe and until it happens to you, you will not realise the full impact. You will become emotional, and hormonal and your body will develop and change in many ways.
For your own personal and physical well being, please do not do this - you are still young, and have plenty of time to be exploring your sexuality when you get a bit older, and your body has developed more. You are a long time old.
Teenage boys can only think about sex. They do not care where they get it, and believe me they would sleep with anything if they thought they could get away with it. As women have periods which mark the development from child to adult, boys have a completely different set of developmental changes. They have a constant urge to have sex. Sometimes they cannot control this. But it is part of their growing process to learn that they CANT have sex everytime they want it, and they have to LEARN to CONTROL those feelings - this is the transition from boy to man.
If this guy really likes you, then he will understand and wait, and not force you, or guilt you into doing what he wants.
Good luck to you
Tiger xx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2009): Thanks x
...............................
A
female
reader, hands_down317  +, writes (29 May 2009):
 Absolutely you can :) Nothing would be different if you had your period either.
Kate
...............................
A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (29 May 2009):
 will say this as a note please do not go any further than foreplay do not have sex also its illegal. since your asking for advice on that you really need to know your stuff before having sex. yes you can still do foreplay just as normal just periods sync with the becoming of a woman. good luck aphex
...............................
|
