A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Alright, I have a very strange situation here. I'm in a long distance relationship (Haven't met in person yet, but yes, she definitely is who she says she is) with a girl 3 years younger than me. I'm 18, she's 15. She's very mature for her age, we've been together for 3 months, and I do believe that I truly love her and she loves me. This isn't some fake thing like most people my age have. We treat our relationship with 100% respect and care. The issue is, she is very protective of herself. She's been hurt a lot in the past, and she puts up walls sometimes between us. Like she's guarding herself or something. She told me she thinks I'll end up hurting her. She also hasn't even told me where she lives yet (Only the state), and she was really reluctant to give out her phone number at first (We met on facebook). What should I do about this? Second part, I am afraid to text her. I don't know what it is. I feel weird about texting her first, like I'm bothering her or something. I guess part of it is because she doesn't really ask me all that many questions, or act really interested. It makes no sense. Like usually I say "Hey3 how are you?" and I get "Hi3 im good". Not really continuing the conversation. Are guys supposed to ask the questions? Because she's never asked "So what are you doing today?" or "What do you think you're doing when you graduate?" etc. Always been me.I guess a tiny part of me is also worried that someones going to say "The age difference is too big, it just won't last", because I know that's a big issue as well.Thanks in advance,-Logan
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2011): The age gap is nothing I mean if she's 20 and you're 23.
Look, she's 15 and you're 18. You haven't met yet and you're talking like you know this girl intimately and she is your girlfriend. She's not your girlfriend, she is a CHILD. You are an ADULT. Seems to me like she is being the adult in this "relationship" by being guarded and not letting you know every intimate detail about her.
You need to meet a real woman your own age and stop living in this fantasy.
A
female
reader, justjess  +, writes (1 January 2011):
 She was sensible to be hesitant when giving her phone number, and don't pressure her to tell you where she lives, you've been speaking for 3 months and have never met. for all she knows your some psycopahic killer.
Ask her to talk, tell you what is bothering her and say that you feel like she never asks you anyhting and you want her to, she may feel that you'll getput off if she's consantly asking Qs and she doesn't want that, so let her know how you feel.
You also have to be brutally honest with each other, is this relationship going to work, do both of you actively want to have any future together and are you willing to meet, or would it be better for one or both of you if this remaind as two good internet pals?
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